Rick Rollance

Put a little Zyn spit on my 56° and immediately chipped in after. You do the math, liberal.

Bumped into an old classmate that is “going through a rough divorce”, when the fuck did we get old enough for that

How long til I can lowball someone for a flying car on marketplace

Alexa find me play station 2 mint condition with guitar hero slash version and also a pocket pussy

I say fuck the data centers, until I use ChatGPT to make my buddy fat and Chinese, then I’m right back in

Is the Zyn pouch biodegradable or should I keep swallowing them?

Hoeflation real as hell, that sexy lady in pretty woman was $300 for the night and I gave the same just for some dusty bitch to breathe on it a little

Can someone give me $8,195

Shit, Ozzy Osbourne died

Facebook suggested should just be called “here’s this dweeb your chick used to bounce on”

Like snowboarding, the hot box is more of a winter weather sport

Maybe this does make me a bitch, I’m gonna revisit this at a later date. Feedback has been noted.

I’m lethal with those little gay oranges, Cuties, I can throw em’ like a mile. If you put me on a par 3 course with no clubs and just 18 Cuties, I’m gonna get a hole in 1 every 12 minutes

I wish a blender and lots of fruits would show up at my door and also an Asian lady to stroke my shit freaky style

30yo buddy just added “low key” to his vocabulary I’ve been combating this by adding “on the highest of keys” anytime something is very obvious. Our wives are both sleeping w very large black men at the moment.

I used to smoke weed out of empty beer cans and now I’m particular about which spring water I drink, makes me want to kick my own ass

If we met one time 5 years ago in a loud bar and I randomly text you wishing you happiness and success- just know I am on COMMERCIAL levels of Vyvanse