Quote Pictures™

Girls be like: "The text oomf just sent me >>>>>>>" The text: whats up bitch

You hate me? Okay, one less bitch to worry about.

When Mom starts counting to 3*Mom: 1!Me: Do u really think counting will make me do anything?Mom: 2!Me: Oh shit! I'm going, i'm going!

can't spell ugly without u

Why fall in love when you can fall asleep

"WHO'S THAT SEXY BEAST?!" Oh, I clicked on my profile again.

Miley Cyrus is the perfect example of someone who gives 0 fucks

Bitches be like I don't care nomore 👫 🔭👀

In Russia the police is arresting people that are Gay. Watch the video in my Last Tweet.

I want to stop drinking...but my mom didn't raise a quitter!

*Texts back 3 months later* Sorry I fell asleep.

Homeless logic: Why live in a $200,000 dollar home, when I can live under a $5 million dollar bridge?

The first 5 days after the weekend are always the hardest.

Walk of shame? More like stride of pride.

Using y = mx b to measure the slope of that ass.

Girls who act stupid because they think it's cute need to be slapped in the face with a brick.

Lil Wayne be like:Got my grandma on speed dial, call it Instagram

What do you call someone who doesn't know how to use a condom? Dad.

"WE NEED TO HANG OUT!!"*NEVER HAPPENS*

I really don't care about the party. I just came for free food.