A new invention for all to enjoy... There's never been a better time to own the ingenious steam-powered candle! Now you can get in the mood while coughing and choking! Utterly indispensible.

At last, you can doodle through the power of algorithms? And it's all thanks to the deep-learning gel pen! Further investment required.

Prepare to be flabbergasted by P. Funke Contraptions Ltd.'s nonstick desk fan! Now you can keep the house cool without worrying about a lengthy clean-up afterwards! What will they think of next?

Look out, world! It's the odoriferous dish-washing machine! A new way to enjoy sparkling-clean dishes all the while teased by the tantalising aroma of gardenia! This device will change your life.

Now even you can avoid getting lost (puncture repair kit not included)? There's never been a better time to own the creative inflatable satellite navigation system! Buy yours today!

Now you can work standing OR sitting gently enveloped in the smell of sage and chestnut... With O. Pepyr & Co.'s fabulous odoriferous standing desk! Money back if not delighted.

We live in a time of wonders. Introducing M. Hardon & Co.'s nonsticking harpsichord! At last, a new way to play music safe in the knowledge that nothing will stick! Designed for the modern era.

Forget sliced bread! Introducing the terrific rocket-fuelled watch battery! Following years of research, anyone can store energy in orbit! Invest now!

As seen at the world's fair: Searing & Sons's hydraulic fax machine! Now there's a way to send a document under intense pressure! Investment opportunities forthcoming.

Are YOU ready for the amazing aromatic deep fat fryer? Offering the unique ability to make fries gently enveloped in the smell of bergamot and verbena! Highly recommended by all who try it.

By Jove, what a time to be alive. Introducing... the anti-adhesive home telephone! At last, there's a way to speak to family without sticking! More information available on request.

I can scarcely believe my eyes? It's the fab neural net ice cream scoop! Now even you can serve up a delicious scoop of ice cream while an algorithm does all the hard work! A delightful conversation piece.

Now you can break out the Merlot and clean up easily afterwards... And it's all thanks to Immet Mechanicals Corporation's nonstick bottle opener! Please contact us for more information.

As seen at the world's fair: CK Yogg Industries's astonishing long lasting motorcar! Now there's a way to enjoy our nations great highways for up to 6 hours! Become one of the first to own!

Cripes, what a time to be alive! Look out, world! It's the steam-powered shoe-horn! Now there's a way to put on shoes while coughing and spluttering! Only $999!

Think you know bottle openers? Think again... Introducing the cracking and trendsetting edible corkscrew! Now you can take a tipple or enjoy a healthy snack! Will wonders never cease?

As seen at the world's fair: F. Graszp & Sons's superior quality asbestos-coated fire extinguisher! Offering the unique ability to put out a fire without the danger of fire! Whatever next?

Think you know everything there is to know about garden mowers? Think again! There's never been a better time to own Gobb & Larden Industrial's ahead-of-its-time blow-up mower! Now you can keep grass looking sharp (do not use near sharp objects)! Send for illustrated catalogue.

Look out, world! It's the flameproof parasol! A new way to stay safe on sunny days without risk of fire! This device will change your life.

A splendid new invention is at hand! The battery-powered food mixer! A new way to mix any batter with no cables attached! We are now accepting orders!