LR

Puts a little castor oil on my brain.

❤️

RIP Sue Johanson. Sorry about all the times we called your show and then hung up laughing when someone answered because we were 12.

A wonderful show full of perfect characters and Fred is just magic.

Sees the new Little Mermaid once: I should do some sit-ups.

The difference between questions from a toddler and questions from people who are super high is minimal. My child said “why are these my eyes?” to me this morning and I truly did not have an answer.

One fun thing about this weather is that it’s beautiful walking in the sunshine and then as soon as you step into a shadow, you might slip and break your femur.

Refreshing the page like you’re trying to get Beyoncé tickets except you’re just trying to sign your kid up for swimming lessons.

Will I be able to follow the story of Magic Mike’s Last Dance if I haven’t seen Magic Mike or Magic Mike XXL?

Shout out to the illustrator of this book for instilling a fear of birds, right off the hop.

Mentos: “You’re gonna drop us on the floor of your car.”

Every single cold and flu bug coming to greet my child the second he steps foot into daycare.

You may leave radio, but the dreams about calling a business the wrong name for an entire remote and forgetting to mention their big giveaway will never leave you.

We don’t need to make any more koozies. In the world. We have more than enough. Every house has 6 too many already, so put your catchy saying on something else and call it a day.

This pack-a-day habit is going to ruin us, financially.

You think you’ve seen bad photos of yourself until you let your toddler take some pictures of you. That shit is upsetting.

Loosies in 2023.