Everett Lintz

YOU KNOW THEY SAY ALL MEN ARE CREATED EQUAL! But you look at BRON BREAKKER and you look at the other five guys in Money in the Bank, and you KNOW that ain’t true! Normally, with 6 men, Bron’s got a 16 2/3% chance of winning. BUT BRON’S A GENETIC FREAK AND HE’S NOT NORMAL! So you take his 16 2/3% and add 50%, because HALF those guys are gonna shit themselves when they hear that DOG BARK! Now Bron’s at 66 2/3%. THEN you add another 25%, because he’s got STEINER BLOOD, and everybody knows Steiner genetics give you at least another quarter! Now he’s at 91 2/3%. THEN you add 33 1/3% because THERE’S A 100% CHANCE somebody’s getting SPEARED IN HALF! Now Bron’s at 125%. And THEN you add his ORIGINAL 16 2/3% chance back in, BECAUSE YOU CAN’T JUST THROW AWAY GOOD MATH! 125% + 16 2/3% = 141 2/3% CHANCE OF BRON BREAKKER WINNING MONEY IN THE BANK! THE NUMBERS DON’T LIE! AND THEY SPELL DISASTER FOR EVERYBODY ELSE TONIGHT!