Author of Mr Bennet's Memoirs and the Charlotte Collins Mysteries. Travel writer and fictioneer interested in all realms of the imagination.
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ALT A diagram of a complex mechanism for readers. The caption explains “when the quantity of unread books reaches a specific weight, the mechanism restricts the reader’s ability to add to their stockpile until the backlog has been reduced.” The “restriction” is achieved by placing a cloche over the reader’s credit card, library card and bookshop loyalty card, and smashing their internet router with a mallet.
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ALT Title: How many books should I take on holiday with me? Image: A seemingly helpful flowchart that begins with the the question "Have you got a book in your suitcase" but soon becomes a recursive loop causing the reader to put an ever-increasing quantity of books into larger and larger suitcases.
ALT See threaded tweets for alt text.
ALT ALT Text: Image reads “Virtual JaneCon. July 13th through 14th, 2024. 2024 Schedule. View the Full Schedule Online at www.VirtualJaneCon.com.” and features a stylized cutout of an 18th century illustration by C E Brock from the 1895 edition of Pride and Prejudice.
ALT Panel 1: A man finds a ghost reading a book and says "I thought you’d died?". The ghost replies "My Life has ended but I cannot pass over to the spirit realm when so much remains undone." Panel 2: The man says "You mean all those books you bought and never got around to reading?". The ghost turns to look at bookshelves piled high with books and says "It won’t take long. There are fewer distractions when you’re dead." Panel 3: A few months later... The man says "Is it me, or are the piles getting bigger?" (there are indeed more books than previously) "My Library card still works!" says the Ghost happily "But once I’ve read these I’ll start on the ones in the attic."
