ren

hi all, i’m really sorry for the inactivity. since the news of minho’s enlistment being this soon, i’ve had so many painful feelings weighing on me. honestly, i felt devastated. i won’t even get to see him on tour one last time, and the more it all sunk in, the worse it became. i want to share a few thoughts, so this is a lengthy post. firstly, this goes without saying but enlistment is not a positive experience. he will be alone in an environment which is undeniably distressing. he has spent the past nine years of his life surrounded by the love and support of stays and the members. and now, for a long period of time, he will be almost completely separated from that, his home, his family, his routine, his favourite foods and his pets. it’s difficult and horrible for anyone to go through, and it hurts knowing someone i care so much will face it without any choice. i also want to mention how disappointed i was by some of the immediate discussions on here that followed the announcement. “he’s a grown man, he can handle it.” “there’s no need to be dramatic/cry over it.” “he’s basically going on a break, he’ll come back hotter and buff.” “it’s normal for groups to continue without a member and not a big deal.” “he’ll change. he’ll be completely different when he’s back.” “he might want to be an idol anymore.” “he’s going to lose his silly personality.” a mixture of downplaying and fearmongering, and of course… “stop bringing up jisung.” “omfg minsungers won’t even see him as an individual outside of a ship.” “finally, minsungers will shut up for two years.” “i hope jisung enlists when minho is back.” i understand that everyone is exposed to different sides of an argument, that’s simply the way the tl works, but the least people can do is look beyond individual posts, or consider what narrative they’re contributing to before posting about it. i’m tired of seeing things being interpreted in the worst possible way, or an entire group of people being subjected to shame and hostility because of the opinions of an unrepresentative minority. every member will feel minho’s absence. that includes jisung, who, according to the skz members themselves, shares the closest bond with him. yet somehow, even the mention of jisung in this context was enough to trigger discourse. it’s frustrating that this consistently happens when it comes to these two, despite how openly and fondly they have spoken of each other and their relationship. we should be able to talk about this topic without pretending that the people closest to minho won't be affected. people are celebrating that people who support minsung will “no longer have content” and that is, quite frankly, disgusting. furthermore, some are hoping for jisung to enlist immediately after minho returns so they spend longer apart. that behaviour is what people should be calling out, not just posts that simply express how jisung will be affected. because he will. of course he will miss the person he considers his soulmate, who he shares a home with, and who has stayed by his side though countless nights. it shouldn’t be twisted into something controversial. minho is so, so precious to the members and to us. i wish we could spend this time appreciating him and cherishing every moment we still have together instead of all these arguments. for a moment, i was inclined to stay inactive, but i really don’t want that. i want to be here and have you all. i want to talk about how much i love minho and how much i’ll miss him. i want to be able to express that without feeling like i have to defend it. (1/2)