Stephen Henry

Despite their denotation, sucks and blows can mean the same thing.

Since were getting a new spiderman again, we should at least have a cameo of stan lee as uncle ben

I have become "that guy" who poops at work.

I probably met some other redditor in real life and on Reddit but I will never know who and where

How dors a blind person know when to stop wiping?

I hope my children grow up in a world where they don't have to worry about their left headphone dying on them.

In the film Armageddon, Bruce Willis played a suicide bomber

Stalking happens because people follow their dreams.

It bothers me that Hogwarts appears to have conventional plumbing.

I bet that Medieval torture rack that stretched you out until you died felt really good for the first few seconds.

The cat version of 'fetch' is to watch the cat push your shit off the table and watch you fetch it up and put it back.

Is a complicated thing still a complicated thing if one stops thinking about it?

What if the people who comment "seek counseling" in r/relationships are counsellors trying to drive demand up?

Your father is literally a motherfucker

My daily life is like the reruns of a TV show, and the only new stuff happens on Friday Nights around prime time.

Gym memberships should be free - those who wish to go should have any fees paid by their health insurance.

"I like to make up quotes and attribute them to famous people" - Daniel Radcliffe

If "equal" was a shape, it would be a circle.

Pillows should have indents for ears close to either edge for people prone to ear infections.

One eye allows you to see in 2D. Two eyes allow you to see 3D. Does three eyes allow you to see in 4D?