Nolan Doyle

Just clapped like a seal for Trey on stern

Equinox steam room referee

Equinox bathroom referee

George Carlin gets a lot of shit nowadays but farts are shit without the mess is perfect comedy writing

We are expecting to see more chin implants “chinplants” heading into 2027

Just had fig newtons for the first time since when I was a kid and wow they are dry as a bone

Jerking off is all seven deadly sins and I won’t explain how

Everyone needs to stop having sex for a little while until we can figure out what’s going on

I cancelled because I didn’t want to go to the driver’s house to watch him drop off his gun. The second driver asked if I wanted to watch the new (at the time) the Rock movie called Black Adam. I said sure and he put it up on the dashboard and we watched it together. Nice moment

The last time I took Uber from Philadelphia to New York the driver asked if he could stop at house to drop off his gun which I thought was very responsible. I will be taking Amtrak today despite the massive delays due to the fact that my train murdered a man in Wilmington. So it goes

I can’t listen to that because I don’t have headphones because they died because I’m stuck at Philadelphia train station because someone jumped in front of the Amtrak in Wilmington Delaware

You ever been delayed so long you just went somewhere else?

What about Vito-proof majority? Is that anything?

They’re calling it the domino ™️

You’re telling me PIZZA is unavailable in NEW YORK?

I turned on grayscale so that I could see what my phone looks like to a dog

I turned on grayscale on my phone and doubled my screen time

Step throat

I hope you all find me sufferable

Just turned on grayscale on my phone and this shit is ass