Aashna Iyer

Where was I when they were handing out the "You Get a Billion Dollar Startup" kit in college? . . . Oh ya... In the line for "You Get Peanuts so You Can Follow Your Passion and Sell Soap" line.

Explain to me why I have a lifetime membership at the dentist but my cats are here running full tilt into doors and breaking off their teeth with no consequences?

Ignored my alarm today to hear piping hot tea from someone I've not spoken to in a decade about a total stranger in my dream. Worth it.

Nothing like cleaning bombil to convince you never to eat it again.

There's a special place in hell for people who install foghorns in their cars and honk at everyone.

Why am I heading to Mulund in an auto on a Summer Sunday Morning? I don't know. Clearly I had a mental episode when I agreed to this.

I just asked a team member who was the singer of the track she wanted to use for a brand reel. "Some lady" ... It was Gwen Stefani. #TooOldForThisShit

Why is #MetroInDino basically a Maroon5 music video?

I kept telling my cat to sleep on the bed instead of the table, but then I thought... I should understand her perspective. So I took a nap at the dining table with her for a half hour. Now my neck is stiff and my arm has fallen asleep. Gonna tell her to sleep in the bed only.

At this stage, I'll buy anything @TigerBalmIndia sells me. What is this oil?! My nose was starting to feel like #WEH in rush hour... A drop of oil and it's suddenly WEH at 5am!

Meetings are just people-salad and offices are just large refrigerators so the ingredients stay as fresh as possible. #ThoughtForTheDay

Excuse me @4700BC_ please make sure you never ever discontinue this, else I will fall into a deep state of despair. Warm regards.

It's #MasterchefAU time and I'm fully ready to feed people.

Is this some variant of Murphy's Law that the slowest traffic must invariably be when the temperature is highest? Who's in these vehicles, white people with a sunshine craving?

Dear whoever told me it's "extremely hot" in Delhi... Me, and my cute winter outfits are both very very annoyed.

Ummm... Not what I mean by "side dishes", friend...

Marry a guy who reads... He'll distract himself during long airport waits by talking to random strangers 🤝🏽 #VacayModeOn

#PSA: This #nazar thing is insane. Buri, tedhi, tirchi, all probably damaging in some way or form. Never venture out without a dhaaga.

Movie idea: Two people lock eyes in a traffic jam and then start noticing each other at the same time everyday. They eventually have a turbulent relationship which ends when one of them starts taking the metro. It's called "Eternal Clusterfuck of Juhu Circle" #MumbaiTraffic

Update for everyone who so raptly tracks my life... @TigerBalmIndia is magic. I'm shook. What knee pain? Take that, 30s 💪🏽