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Prison Mitch (@Prisonmitch) profile picture

Prison Mitch

@Prisonmitch

Assistant to the Press Secretary of Florida (retired). Tariff Expert and part time shitposter.

 The Free State of Florida
Joined April 2020
  • Tweets49.3K
  • Following1.7K
  • Followers107K
21.8KMedia
Photo by Prison Mitch (@Prisonmitch)Photo by Prison Mitch (@Prisonmitch)Photo by Prison Mitch (@Prisonmitch)Photo by Prison Mitch (@Prisonmitch)Photo by Prison Mitch (@Prisonmitch)Photo by Prison Mitch (@Prisonmitch)Photo by Prison Mitch (@Prisonmitch)Photo by Prison Mitch (@Prisonmitch)Photo by Prison Mitch (@Prisonmitch)Photo by Prison Mitch (@Prisonmitch)
Muslims after getting a Tesla Roadster:
Image from Prison Mitch (@Prisonmitch)
Elon Musk (@elonmusk) profile pictureElon Musk
@elonmuskOct 16
Turns out the future does have flying cars
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Rex Ryan checking the little piggies and making them feel better after he ran them over.
Image from Prison Mitch (@Prisonmitch)
TMZ (@TMZ) profile pictureTMZ
@TMZ2h
🚨 BREAKING: Rex Ryan arrested for allegedly hitting 2 pedestrians, running over their feet. Details: tmz.me/4sW7c2m
Sorry, I can't help with describing or identifying people in images.

ALT Sorry, I can't help with describing or identifying people in images.

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Prison Mitch retweeted
Jarvis (@jarvis_best) profile picture
Jarvis
@jarvis_best1h
“Oh nooooo oh no oh I accidentally ran over your feet with my car. My gosh. Let’s get those shoes off right away and have a looksie.”
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“Your honor, my client loves feet and would never commit such a heinous act.”
Image from Prison Mitch (@Prisonmitch)
New York Post (@nypost) profile pictureNew York Post
@nypost2h
Rex Ryan arrested for allegedly running over pedestrians' feet in heated Nashville scene trib.al/ZCYBGLt
Image from New York Post (@nypost)
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“In China, we just sleep with American manufacturing CEOs to get chips.”
Image from Prison Mitch (@Prisonmitch)
Kalshi (@Kalshi) profile pictureKalshi
@Kalshi3h
BREAKING: Jensen Huang's lover helped move $7,500,000,000 in restricted Nvidia AI chips into China during affair 43% chance Jensen leaves as CEO before 2028
Image from Kalshi (@Kalshi)
Image from Kalshi (@Kalshi)
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THE KRAKEN IS BEING RELEASED FOR REAL THIS TIME.
Kylie Jane Kremer (@KylieJaneKremer) profile pictureKylie Jane Kremer
@KylieJaneKremer13h
Bombshells coming tomorrow about Georgia
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Mark Levin about to get hacked
AOL Customer Support (@AOLSupportHelp) profile pictureAOL Customer Support@AOLSupportHelp21h
Replying to @ZiffyKat @marklevinshow
Hi there. We would love to take a look into this matter. Could you please DM us with your email address and some additional details regarding this issue?
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Kurt Eichenwald when he sees a tentacled UFO
Image from Prison Mitch (@Prisonmitch)
Insider Paper (@TheInsiderPaper) profile pictureInsider Paper
@TheInsiderPaper20h
A giant, jellyfish-shaped unidentified object reportedly filmed hovering in the direction of a US military base in Alaska before vanishing from sight within minutes
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My Uber Eats driver showing up with my $19.50 Costco hotdogs
Image from Prison Mitch (@Prisonmitch)
Kalshi (@Kalshi) profile pictureKalshi
@Kalshi20h
JUST IN: Company launches delivery service for Costco's $1.50 hot dog, charging customers $18 for delivery
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Mark Levin only watches movies on Betamax
Mark R. Levin (@marklevinshow) profile pictureMark R. Levin
@marklevinshow22h
Folks, I have spent literally the entire day trying to get someone at AOL to unlock my email. For the last eight hours, I have been told that the issue has been escalated to supervisors who would contact me. I haven't heard a thing. You would think that, since I'm one of the last human beings on the face of the Earth still using AOL, they would take care of this. You'd be wrong. So, once this gets resolved, hopefully before the next presidential election, I'm dropping them. (I kept them this long out of convenience, but now I have no reason to keep them.) I'll see you on the radio at 6 p.m., at which time I will address this further.
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Mark Levin still can’t believe it’s not butter.
Mark R. Levin (@marklevinshow) profile pictureMark R. Levin
@marklevinshow22h
Folks, I have spent literally the entire day trying to get someone at AOL to unlock my email. For the last eight hours, I have been told that the issue has been escalated to supervisors who would contact me. I haven't heard a thing. You would think that, since I'm one of the last human beings on the face of the Earth still using AOL, they would take care of this. You'd be wrong. So, once this gets resolved, hopefully before the next presidential election, I'm dropping them. (I kept them this long out of convenience, but now I have no reason to keep them.) I'll see you on the radio at 6 p.m., at which time I will address this further.
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Mark Levin sent this tweet from a Compaq Presario 1200 using Windows 98 on a dialup modem.
Mark R. Levin (@marklevinshow) profile pictureMark R. Levin
@marklevinshow22h
Folks, I have spent literally the entire day trying to get someone at AOL to unlock my email. For the last eight hours, I have been told that the issue has been escalated to supervisors who would contact me. I haven't heard a thing. You would think that, since I'm one of the last human beings on the face of the Earth still using AOL, they would take care of this. You'd be wrong. So, once this gets resolved, hopefully before the next presidential election, I'm dropping them. (I kept them this long out of convenience, but now I have no reason to keep them.) I'll see you on the radio at 6 p.m., at which time I will address this further.
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Prison Mitch retweeted
Kyle Beckley (@Kyle_Beckley) profile picture
Kyle Beckley
@Kyle_BeckleyNov 10
I hope to God that China doesn't find out I have the cure for cancer and I am staying at the Ramada Inn room 113.
Kalshi (@Kalshi) profile pictureKalshi
@KalshiNov 9
BREAKING: Nvidia stock plunges nearly -5% as images of Jensen Huang and his Chinese spy lover surface 35% chance Jensen leaves as CEO before 2028
Image from Kalshi (@Kalshi)
Image from Kalshi (@Kalshi)
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Chinese honeypots seeing all the millionaires working at Anthropic:
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Kalshi (@Kalshi) profile pictureKalshi
@KalshiNov 10
BREAKING: 1 in 70 Americans worth over $100 million could be Anthropic employees after IPO Nearly 100% chance Anthropic officially announces an IPO this year
Image from Kalshi (@Kalshi)
Image from Kalshi (@Kalshi)
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Was getting ready to hit send on a post and @jarvis_best’s hand popped up. WTF is this sorcery
Image from Prison Mitch (@Prisonmitch)
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Me who doesn’t pay the cleaning lady because he’s married to her:
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FINISH THE SNYDER CUT!
DiscussingFilm (@DiscussingFilm) profile pictureDiscussingFilm
@DiscussingFilmNov 9
James Gunn and Peter Safran will no longer run DC Studios. Jeremy Latcham, who previously served as a producer at Marvel Studios, is taking over DC. (Source: hollywoodreporter.com/movies…)
Image from DiscussingFilm (@DiscussingFilm)
Image from DiscussingFilm (@DiscussingFilm)
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Me feeding my family now because Jensen Huang banged a Chinese spy
Kalshi (@Kalshi) profile pictureKalshi
@KalshiNov 9
BREAKING: Nvidia stock plunges nearly -5% as images of Jensen Huang and his Chinese spy lover surface 35% chance Jensen leaves as CEO before 2028
Image from Kalshi (@Kalshi)
Image from Kalshi (@Kalshi)
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Prison Mitch retweeted
Prison Mitch (@Prisonmitch) profile picture
Prison Mitch
@PrisonmitchNov 9
Image from Prison Mitch (@Prisonmitch)
Kalshi Finance (@Kalshi_Finance) profile pictureKalshi Finance
@Kalshi_FinanceNov 8
BREAKING: Nvidia CEO Jensen Huang admits to an extramarital relationship with a Chinese spy 75% chance he's out as $NVDA CEO before 2028
Image from Kalshi Finance (@Kalshi_Finance)
Image from Kalshi Finance (@Kalshi_Finance)
Readers added context they thought people might want to know
Huang admitted to an extramarital affair in a memo to Nvidia staff but did not say it was with a Chinese spy. Reports of her suspected spying come from US intelligence; the company board launched a separate investigation. nvidianews.nvidia.com/news/statement… theverge.com/ai-artificial-… techcrunch.com/2026/11/08/nvi…
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My NVIDIA stock after seeing the Jensen story:
Image from Prison Mitch (@Prisonmitch)
Image from Prison Mitch (@Prisonmitch)
Marc A. Ross (@marcaross) profile pictureMarc A. Ross
@marcarossNov 9
You might not be interested in geopolitics, but geopolitics is interested in you.
Image from Marc A. Ross (@marcaross)
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Image from Prison Mitch (@Prisonmitch)
Kalshi Finance (@Kalshi_Finance) profile pictureKalshi Finance
@Kalshi_FinanceNov 8
BREAKING: Nvidia CEO Jensen Huang admits to an extramarital relationship with a Chinese spy 75% chance he's out as $NVDA CEO before 2028
Image from Kalshi Finance (@Kalshi_Finance)
Image from Kalshi Finance (@Kalshi_Finance)
Readers added context they thought people might want to know
Huang admitted to an extramarital affair in a memo to Nvidia staff but did not say it was with a Chinese spy. Reports of her suspected spying come from US intelligence; the company board launched a separate investigation. nvidianews.nvidia.com/news/statement… theverge.com/ai-artificial-… techcrunch.com/2026/11/08/nvi…
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