Vivek's big line at a presidential debate was calling Nikki Haley "Dick Cheney in three-inch heels." Ohio, that's the policy depth he wants to bring to Columbus.
Vivek proposed raising the voting age to 25 unless young people pass a civics test or serve. Now he wants their votes for governor. Ohio, under-25s, return the favor Tuesday.
Vivek promised $4 million to air Amy Acton's estranged mother calling her a liar. He yanked it after about $1 million and claimed it "ran to completion." Ohio, even his smears quit early.
Vivek stood outside a Miami courthouse and promised to pardon Trump on day one, before a single trial. He was running against Trump at the time. Ohio, he groveled to his own opponent.
Vivek promised to shut down the federal agency that inspects nuclear power plants. Ohio has two of them, both on Lake Erie. Ohio, he'd fire the inspector and call it freedom.
Vivek, a birthright citizen himself, said he'd deport American-born kids of illegal immigrants, even grown adults. Ohio, he climbed the ladder and went looking for a saw.
Vivek hinted that the Chiefs' Super Bowl run and Taylor Swift's romance were rigged to help Democrats. Ohio, he thinks football is fixed and wants you to trust him with the budget.
Vivek took a $90,000 Soros family scholarship for law school, later saying he didn't have the money. That same year he reported $2.25 million in income. Ohio, he'll cry broke for yours too.
Vivek promised to send troops into Mexico and told its president there'd be "a new daddy in town." He's never served or won an election. Ohio, he's planning wars before winning a race.
Ohio's biggest newspaper broke its own no-endorsement rule just to warn you about Vivek. Now venues are canceling his tour stops. Ohio, when the room clears out, take the hint.
Vivek spent $4 million putting Amy Acton's estranged mother on TV. Mike DeWine, the Republican governor who endorsed him, called it "deeply, deeply troubling." Ohio, even his allies flinched.
Vivek ran for president promising to shut down the federal agency that runs school lunches. Now he wants to run Ohio. Parents, pack a sandwich.
Vivek told a national debate audience that "the climate change agenda is a hoax." Ohio farmers losing crops to floods and drought, he already filed you under hoax too.
Vivek promised to free Edward Snowden, the NSA leaker living in Russia, and the founder of the Silk Road dark web drug market. Ohio, that's his idea of law and order.
Vivek told Russell Brand that Israel's aid wouldn't be necessary after 2028. Weeks later, after the backlash, he said he might even raise it. Ohio, his convictions come with a return policy.
Vivek told a GOP debate crowd he was the only one on stage not bought and paid for. The crowd booed him. Ohio, even Republicans in the room weren't buying it.
Vivek dragged Nikki Haley's daughter into a debate over TikTok. Haley called him scum on live TV. Then he held up a sign that said "Nikki = corrupt." Ohio, this is the guy asking for the keys.
Vivek told Greg Gutfeld he's "dirty, dirty rich." Then he said Medicare and Medicaid were mistakes. Ohio grandma, he already has his. He's coming for yours.
Vivek's campaign ran a property tax ad starring a registered sex offender, then pulled it. He promised Ohio competence. He couldn't even vet his own commercial.
We Remember β retweeted
"So your parents lived through a world war and brought about the greatest economic boom in the nation's history?"
"Yes, Dave."
"Then you grew up in the best economic and cultural conditions imaginable, with a thriving middle class, a strong manufacturing base, and relatively low cost of living?"
"That's right, Dave."
"So when you grew up and became established your first instinct was to offshore American manufacturing, switch all the pension plans for 401Ks, import tons of immigrants to supplement the low-skill labor market and undercutting American wages, lower interest rates which drives up asset prices, and reduce immigration enforcement so the team of 30-something year old Mexicans can keep mowing your lawn for the same price as the teenager you used to pay to do it?"
"You betcha, Dave."
"Now you're going back and forth from your condo in Florida to your house in Madison, while your grandkids struggle to afford groceries in their one bedroom apartment?"
"That's accurate, Dave."
"And you want them to pay more in taxes so you can keep receiving social security, which is only one of four retirement benefits you currently live off, half of them being taxpayer funded?"
"Yeppers!"
"And you think this is justified even though your generation was the first to not have enough kids to fund your social security benefits, and you told your kids and grandkids not to start families till after they were established in their careers, so they had even fewer kids to fund your retirement?"
"Sounds right, Dave."
"And you encouraged all your kids and grandkids to go to college because you knew the labor market was being manipulated with immigration and offshoring, because you're the one who manipulated it, and that resulted in a college degree bubble where a lot of in-demand degrees ended up not paying well-enough to repay the student loans?"
"Yeah, Dave."
"So you voted for the candidate that promised to make student loans federally guaranteed, which only made the college more expensive, and even more difficult to repay?"
"I guess so, Dave."
"And when you die, your family won't even inherit your house and condo because they reverse mortgaged them both to buy a top of the line fishing boat and a truck to haul it from Wisconsin to Florida and back?"
"Well... They'll inherit the boat and truck!"
π€ Made with AI


