Marketing nerd with a penchant for office supplies. Head of Brand at @ShippingEasy. Interview #marketingweirdos at @keepmktgweird podcast. Lifelong #Browns fan.
Austin, TX
Joined April 2009
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Rob Zaleski retweeted
Oh, he lied?
Trump swaggered into Georgia right before the midterms, breathlessly announcing a huge new Audi factory, a massive win for the state he claimed. Here's the receipt: Audi had absolutely no such announcement, no plans to build a plant in Georgia, and no knowledge of this supposed commitment. This wasn't just campaign exaggeration; it was a bald-faced fabrication, invented out of thin air just days before an election, banking on voters not checking if a major international corporation actually agreed to a multi-billion dollar investment during a political rally. It perfectly illustrates how quickly reality gets benched for a headline grab, promising prosperity that only exists in a speech bubble, all while the people who supposedly value "truth" never question the actual facts. thehill.com/homenews/state-w…
Rob Zaleski retweeted
Homosexuality is unnatural.
It says so in a book, where snakes talk, people come back from the dead, a guy walks on water, and a virgin has a baby after being impregnated by a ghost.😏
Man. Yeah I love my politicians to say “yeah stand up and show them that ass.” That’s what politics is really about. What the fuck are we even doing at this point? How the fuck is this what you want in your political leader? HOW??
Your birth certificate abso-fucking-lutely DOES make you an American citizen. Jesus these fucking assholes just want to say it only counts if you’re white. Get this racism out of my government.
Rob Zaleski retweeted
I cannot wrap my head around the endgame here. If you destroy the planet, crash the global economy, and leave ordinary people too broke to buy anything, what exactly are billionaires planning to do with all that money? Sit in underground bunkers staring at bank balances while the world falls apart? Wealth is only valuable when there's a functioning society around it. So what exactly are they trying to win?
Rob Zaleski retweeted
2022: “Stop overreacting, they won’t overturn Roe.”
They did.
2023: “Stop overreacting, they won’t let women die rather than get an abortion.”
They did.
2024: “Stop overreacting, they won’t arrest women for miscarriages.”
They did.
2025: “Stop overreacting, they won’t turn women into incubators.”
They did.
2026: “Stop overreacting, they won’t attack mifepristone.”
They did, today.
Now: “Stop overreacting, they won’t go after birth control next.”
They will.
Rob Zaleski retweeted
Fox News is putting Nicki Minaj up telling people to vote red.
Let’s break that down.
Can Nicki Minaj vote? No.
She’s not a U.S. citizen.
Can Nicki Minaj’s husband vote? No, he’s a registered sex offender.
Can Nicki Minaj’s brother vote? No, he’s serving 25 years to life for child sexual assault.
She seems like the perfect spokesperson for MAGA republicans.
I mean…look, you’re not wrong. This would just add to our many penalties. But we have been fucked by so many bad calls over the years, I’m letting it slide.
Cleveland's long late gain by TE Harold Fannin Jr. should have been nullified by a blatant false start. nbcsports.com/nfl/profootbal…
Rob Zaleski retweeted
When Trump says the US is "making money like never before," he's not talking about you. He's talking about himself, his family, and his billionaire buddies. He doesn't give a fuck about you.
Picked up Tyler Higbee in fantasy with Adams out. Two TDs to a tight end…Allen. I might actually be done with fantasy. It really isn’t worth the stress on top of the stress of being a Browns fan.
The Browns are not good for my blood pressure but I will be locked in next week. Holy hell. #DawgPound
Less than 3 minutes and the Browns are leaving people wide the fuck open. We want to lose to a 1-5 team so badly. Jesus.
Why the fuck can the Browns not handle Tony Pollard?? What the hell is happening? Is he our kryptonite? Unbelievable.
Once again. No one beats the Browns better than the Browns. Just throwing away so many opportunities.
Man KC has looked so good today and dropping that perfect pass is going to haunt him. Would have been a TD for sure. #Browns #Dawgpound