I like cartoons and horror movies and peanut butter and candies and gummy worms and my friends and family <3 Pls stay away if you're into creepy weird shit Have a lovely dayyyy

I love how some transmascs decide to choose the most random names, like ezekiel or sum shit <3

Why do bad things happen to me

What is the point of having a vending machine if its not even gonna fucking work???? I just want a dam drink

Im actually so fucking tired I have shit to do in like an hour though but I'm just so tired fucking help me

Everybody above the age of 23 get schwiftyyyy Everybody who's scared of papercuts get schwiftyyy Everybody with a severe lack of iron get schwiftyyy

WHERE IS BOOPAH

Went to see digger and spilled soju all over my favourite shirt. Come on, man </3

I miss my dog so much I just wanna pet him and hold him and rub his ears just the way he really liked and give him treats I miss that guy so much

They should do a thing on SNL where every episode they kill someone before the end credits roll

What NOT to say to the other Morties at your first 'bring your Rick to work day': •My Rick could beat up your Rick •Rickless behaviour •How big is his bald spot •Show me your Rick's bald spot •You don't LOOK like a Morty •Don't be a Rickhead •No Dianne? •Are you autistic

Morty,,,

Its so fucking hot I cant do anything about it I'm just stuck here sweaty and fucked up I can't even wear a shirt without breaking up a sweat fuck my life

Shit on the floor

You ever just see an artwork so amazing, so life changing

I need to fucking go to gym on tuesday I can't keep putting that shit off

I feel like an actual ravenous beast, I just feel really full but also I could probably easily eat a shit ton more like I still kinda wanna eat

Who up getting unwise

Waitin in a car Yeah im waitin in a car Waitin for about thirty minutes An hour if i'm unluckyyyyy

I love friendship so much genuinely never kill yourself