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KJ

@stanmoe

Employee. Fraud. Also-I was just about to say something. What were we just talking about?

 Brooklyn, NY
Joined May 2009
  • Tweets722
  • Following297
  • Followers1K
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He’s losing in slow motion, which is the personal hell he’s always had coming.
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Yeah no, totally. 2020 is the problem, that makes sense.
I’ve finally reached the point of quarantine when it’s time to unsubscribe from Uber promotional emails.
⚠️ Mischief cannot be held responsible for Google search results under “cockblock” outside of this spot ⚠️ @OkCupid bit.ly/347uBCW

OKCupid says 'not voting is the world's biggest cockblock'

adage.com
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America is a really dangerous place not to be a billionaire.
With any luck this will make only like 59 million people vote for him.
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Feels like we’re still in the How To Lose a Guy in 10 Days-era of McConaughey’s advertising career
🐓 🙅‍♀️ Not registering to vote is currently America’s biggest cockblock, according to @OkCupid.
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I always thought Star Wars storm troopers were cliche idiot bad shots until this year
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I’d make my kids brush their teeth harder if they weren’t gonna fall out anyway.
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What lucky sports team is going to the white house today
Image from Jason Narducy (@SplitSingleband)
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Even racist pieces of shit can’t stand listening to Donald Trump read the speeches they wrote for him
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Skip intro 2020. FF.
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RIP baby names Donald and Karen
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Replying to @KevinMKruse
@Brun0_T0mas @KevinMKruse
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Only when extra terrestrials subjugate and enslave all human beings will we finally soften on how horrible this president is.
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Every movie handshake fills me with concern
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On the plus side, these masks are doing a great job of raising awareness for chronic halitosis.
Listen, I’m just happy nobody writes rock and roll songs on the subject of rock and roll anymore
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Ok basketball gods, we all watched the Michael Jordan documentary. You can stop the virus shit now.
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