If Dr. Seuss Wrote About Proposition 50 Today… The Gavin-Mander In the state of Cal-i-for-nia, where sunshine should gleam, Lives a slick politician with a big, shiny dream. He cries, “Trump’s destroying democracy! Oh what a shame!” Yet he’s carving odd maps — and he’s playing a new game. He took out his crayons, his scissors, his power, And locked in his rule from the top of his tower. He said, “Let’s redraw the lines — oh, what fun!” And called it Prop 50, to make sure he won. He drew the Sierra Snout, up north on the map, An elephant’s head with a long, twisted flap. Its trunk from the Sierras to Sac it extends — A beast so bizarre, democracy bends. He sketched the Seuss Shark-Steed, with a political grin, A creature no voter could ever fit in. Then came the Valley Varmint, wild and absurd, Where farmers and cities were strangely interred. And off in the desert, to voters’ dismay, He birthed the Desert Chomper, to chew them away. Then came the Jigsaw Piece, drawn just for the thrill, A puzzle of power that makes voters ill. A Pouncing Puppy, wagging its tail, To make sure his cronies could never fail. And who could forget, for voters to see, Good old Snoopy, drawn perfectly for D.C.! Then down in the county of oranges and sun, He stretched and he twisted till reason was done. The Yoga Genie, with spine out of whack, Lets L.A. and San Diego tell O.C. what’s what. Each line a doodle, each district bizarre, Drawn perfectly to boost his next PR. While the voters cry out, “Let the people decide!” Gavin grins wide — with his lobbyists by his side. Off to Paris, to London, to Rome he may jet, While your town halls get nothing — not even a sweat. You see, when politicians pick voters, the truth is quite clear, They’re never accountable year after year. They draw their safe seats, they travel abroad, And call it “democracy” — oh, how odd! So beware of the creature that Gavin did make, The Gavin-Mander bends votes ’til they break. If you value your voice and the right to say “no,” Then vote down Prop 50 — let freedom still flow.