Mother Theresa

How old am I??? Remember Burnett’s?? College Freshman out here drinking White Claws but will never understand the burn of taking a pull of $10 Burnett’s in some random frat house with probably a Hoodie Allen song playing in the background. Thats how old I am.

Some of you have never been shit on by a bird and it shows.

2020 is soup, and we’re all forks.

Things I’ve discovered this quarantine: 1. Target is overpriced 2. I took TJMaxx for granted 3. I need to move the fuck out of Illinois

Today I started up my Keurig but forgot the coffee cup. Happy day ???? in quarantine.

The things I would do right now to spend just 3 minutes in a TJMaxx candle aisle. 3 MINUTES.

Ya know, I gotta say, it’s been pretty liberating not having to peer pressure myself to go out. Happy Friday from isolation!! Cheers!

Day idk in quarantine:

Day 4 in quarantine:

Anyone else get an inner burst of happiness when you find the chapstick you’ve been missing for weeks/months/maybe even years??? ~it’s the little things in life~ :)(:

Currently watching He’s Just Not That Into You & felt the need to pass on this quote as a friendly lil’ reminder: “If a guy is treating you like he doesn’t give a shit, he genuinely doesn’t give a shit. No exceptions.” Thank you, carry on.

Future kids: Me as a future “cool” mom: Yeah well back in my day BEFORE weed was legal..

Let’s try to be less sensitive in the new decade. That cool, or does this tweet offend you?? Lol jk!!! But not really. Happy New Years!!!

*Walks into kitchen and finds little brother sitting on the floor staring into the oven* Me: hey buddy whatcha doin? Robby: waiting for the cinnamon rolls to be done so I can get first dibs on the middle one. Respect.