rudy

Staring at a big bug and trying to read its mind

Finally unlocked Mammy Two Shoes as a playable character in Kingdom Hearts

Economists fear the Tower That Reaches The Heavens bubble could pop at any moment

Touching grass (dropped my phone in it 🤮)

Anton Chigurh: What do you get when you guzzle down sweets? Frightened Clerk: Well gee sir, I dunno… Chigugh: Eating as much as an elephant eats? Clerk: Am I supposed to know this? Chugurh: I don’t like the look of it…

Calmly explaining to the small crowd that has gathered that, as an empath, actually I can say It and the Soft A was a sign of respect to their people

Democrats are gonna make it so I can put metal in the microwave, on account of the midterms

HATE a precocious child. Cant fuckin stand em!

I had an accident and I’ve been paralyzed from the waist up. I just walk around apparently fent folding all day but I’m fine. Looking forward to seeing you at company softball.

Hey man I noticed when we were at the museum together that I was reading the placards a lot faster than you. I was having to wait for you to catch up bro. Like I was forgetting what I had read while waiting for you to get to me. You get held back a grade or something bro? Bro…

Misiorowski out here looking like Gracie Bon with that thing

Addicted to NARCAN faking the fent fold outside the police station

Yeah last weekend was pretty crazy, I did NARCAN for the first time

*arguing with the wifey after a night out with the boys* ALRIGHT SO A COP GAVE ME NARCAN, I DIDN’T HAVE A CHOICE

I saw you at the club and you were on your phone.

I’m caffeine sensitive. Don’t drink the stuff. Vis-a-vis I should get to drink beer at work