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lets talk about something that i think is far too normalized within the sub community. dishonesty. for example: i once had a sub approach me about ownership. this was something THEY expressed interest in, and over the course of a few weeks we were actively working toward establishing that dynamic. fast forward a few weeks, and suddenly they no longer had the “mental capacity” to serve. okay, fair enough. i understand that life happens, circumstances change, and sometimes people simply aren’t in the right headspace for a dynamic. so we respectfully ended things and went our separate ways. only for me to see that very same sub, just about a week later, publicly simping and sending to others on the timeline. now, here’s where i have an issue. it’s not that the dynamic ended. it’s not that they chose to send to others. it’s the dishonesty. if you no longer want ownership, SAY THAT. if you want to continue being a community hoe, SAY THAT. if you want the freedom to bounce between dommes and fulfill whatever desire you have that day, then SAY THAT. but don’t hide behind excuses about your mental capacity, your finances, your schedule, or whatever else sounds convenient because you don’t have the backbone to communicate what you actually want. and this brings me to a much bigger conversation… why has lying become so normalized among submissives? we joke about subs being liars. we warn each other about it. we practically EXPECT it at this point. but why? why is dishonesty so common in a community where trust, communication, and vulnerability are supposed to be the foundation of our dynamics? you are allowed to change your mind. you are allowed to want different things. you are allowed to decide that ownership isn’t for you. what you aren’t entitled to is someone’s time, energy, and investment while you feed them excuses instead of the truth. i genuinely believe a lot of submissives would have much better experiences if they simply learned to be honest about their intentions from the beginning. not every domme is going to be compatible with what you want and that’s perfectly fine. but pretending to want one thing while actively seeking another is a waste of everyone’s time. if you want to be a hoe, be a hoe. just be an honest one.