Michelle

me @ me: be enlightened you dumb bitch

customer: my food went bad me: can you take a photo and when did you order it customer: it’s been in room temperature for 5 hours and I ate half of it already ok

the word iconic is thrown around too much. you know what’s iconic? echidnas

when someone says “I’m always the loudest one at _____” like it’s a good thing

I’m super chill said the least chill person

Are people who come from broken families / homes better at being a friend

if I say bye to you then you’re not my friend

“my talent is my work ethic” ugh love nikki glaser

I love when people give me 2 seconds to think and reply

im getting EMOTIONAL

I’m on The Bear S3 Ep2 and so far it’s v unwatchable

can someone give the good vibes festival team free therapy or sumn

I relate to Eric Andre so much

Love when movie descriptions also describe me as a person

happy Father’s Day to my mom

Some girls look so good in a vest, I look like Aladdin

when ppl say “iykyk” about something not worth knowing

my phone being unable to charge and prolonging to buy a new one has been the only thing effective in decreasing my screen time