@CarolynSpring

I help counsellors and psychotherapists to help their clients to recover from trauma via training/books/podcasts/resources: https://xitter.cf/t.co/TweU8E07su.

 MediaCityUK, Salford, UK
linktr.ee/carolynspring
Joined June 2009
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  • Followers12.1K
6.8KMedia
Free trauma recovery guides! 50+ page Therapist’s Guide: A phased approach to trauma treatment. 100+ page Trauma Survivors’ Guide: Neurobiology-based advice for managing trauma. Sign up to our mailing list: carolynspring.com/subscribe #TraumaRecovery #TherapistsConnect
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We need other people to sustain us through dark times. We have evolved as social creatures who are dependent on others for hope, sustenance, and nurture. This is the double-whammy after #trauma and #abuse: a lack of support. Listen: carolynspring.com/podcasts/s… #TherapistsConnect
"When we don't have vision for ourselves, when we don't have hope and belief and imagination for things to be different, then we need to get that hope from outside ourselves."

ALT "When we don't have vision for ourselves, when we don't have hope and belief and imagination for things to be different, then we need to get that hope from outside ourselves."

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One of my standard coping mechanisms after childhood #trauma was to refuse to hope for good things. Shame told me that I didn't deserve them, so what was the point in being eternally disappointed? Listen to my podcast episode: carolynspring.com/podcasts/s… #TherapistsConnect #shame
"We're consumed by shame and that belief in our inherent badness, and we daren't reach out for anything better, because we don't want to be disappointed. So we're protecting ourselves from future pain, the pain of shattered hopes, by not hoping at all. And we just try to manage our symptoms and cope hour by hour, and we daren't lift our eyes to the horizon and wonder what's beyond."

ALT "We're consumed by shame and that belief in our inherent badness, and we daren't reach out for anything better, because we don't want to be disappointed. So we're protecting ourselves from future pain, the pain of shattered hopes, by not hoping at all. And we just try to manage our symptoms and cope hour by hour, and we daren't lift our eyes to the horizon and wonder what's beyond."

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I hated therapy breaks. They pressed every trigger in me of abandonment, rejection and isolation. But learning to first notice and then tolerate this distress, to work with it in the sessions, ended up transformative. Listen: carolynspring.com/podcasts/r… #trauma #TherapistsConnect
"The gaps between therapy sessions can be as developmentally important as the therapy sessions themselves."

ALT "The gaps between therapy sessions can be as developmentally important as the therapy sessions themselves."

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It's easy to blame ourselves (or be blamed by others) for struggling with our emotions and our mental health, as if we're 'choosing' in some way to be like this. But it's not a choice: we've missed out on key learning. Listen: carolynspring.com/podcasts/r… #trauma #TherapistsConnect
"As trauma survivors we missed out on some fundamental developmental stages as babies, as toddlers, as young children, and instead we were exposed to the most horrific forms of abuse and emotional distress. And then we grew into adulthood thinking there's something wrong with us as people: that we're evil, we're toxic, we're bad, we're faulty – because we struggle to manage our emotions."

ALT "As trauma survivors we missed out on some fundamental developmental stages as babies, as toddlers, as young children, and instead we were exposed to the most horrific forms of abuse and emotional distress. And then we grew into adulthood thinking there's something wrong with us as people: that we're evil, we're toxic, we're bad, we're faulty – because we struggle to manage our emotions."

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Kindness, kindness, kindness. I can't overstate the importance of kindness in #trauma recovery – surrounding ourselves (somehow!) with people who are kind, and being as kind as we possibly can be towards ourselves. Listen to my podcast: carolynspring.com/podcasts/k… #TherapistsConnect
“What eventually occurred to me, after many long years of resisting the idea, was that kindness begets kindness. That actually I’ll grow and develop and become a better person, and a kinder person, if I treat myself with kindness. And that, I think, is revolutionary.”

ALT “What eventually occurred to me, after many long years of resisting the idea, was that kindness begets kindness. That actually I’ll grow and develop and become a better person, and a kinder person, if I treat myself with kindness. And that, I think, is revolutionary.”

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When we heard the word 'recovery' we can often as #trauma survivors feel pressured: into the impossible, and into putting up and shutting up, just to keep other people happy. But that's really not what I mean. Listen to my podcast at carolynspring.com/podcasts/w… #TherapistsConnect
“Recovery doesn’t mean living a lie and pretending that the trauma didn’t happen. Recovery just means that trauma doesn’t dominate our life any more.”

ALT “Recovery doesn’t mean living a lie and pretending that the trauma didn’t happen. Recovery just means that trauma doesn’t dominate our life any more.”

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Kindness is massively undervalued in recovery from the extreme (and often unimaginable) unkindness of abuse and #trauma. We think we need something medical, complex, 'official'. But how about we at least START with kindness? Listen: carolynspring.com/podcasts/k… #TherapistsConnect
“Kindness doesn’t judge us. Kindness puts an arm around us and encourages us to keep going. And that’s what we need. We don’t need keyboard warriors pointing out all our inadequacies and shaming us for our imperfections. We need kindness kings who will give us the benefit of the doubt, who’ll treat us with dignity and respect, who’ll honour our efforts, who will see the good in us.”

ALT “Kindness doesn’t judge us. Kindness puts an arm around us and encourages us to keep going. And that’s what we need. We don’t need keyboard warriors pointing out all our inadequacies and shaming us for our imperfections. We need kindness kings who will give us the benefit of the doubt, who’ll treat us with dignity and respect, who’ll honour our efforts, who will see the good in us.”

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The issue is not whether we 'have' #PTSD or #CPTSD or #DID or #OSDD or anxiety or depression or bipolar or OCD or ... or ... or ... The issue is that we are human beings in pain, with unresolved #trauma. Let's start from there. Listen: carolynspring.com/podcasts/w… #TherapistsConnect
“I don’t want to talk in the impersonal, soulless terms of diagnoses and labels. I want to talk in terms of human suffering that needs a solution.”

ALT “I don’t want to talk in the impersonal, soulless terms of diagnoses and labels. I want to talk in terms of human suffering that needs a solution.”

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There is every good reason why we develop dissociative identity disorder: because the #trauma we've suffered has made it incredibly painful to be us, even to be alive. What does recovery therefore look like? Find out on my podcast': carolynspring.com/podcasts/w… #TherapistsConnect
“Dissociative identity disorder is when it is too painful to be ourselves and we have to become other versions of us just to cope with the pain of being alive.”

ALT “Dissociative identity disorder is when it is too painful to be ourselves and we have to become other versions of us just to cope with the pain of being alive.”

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Trauma is beyond-painful. Suggesting that it can be resolved quickly and easily – with a kind of rah-rah toxic positivity – can feel offensive. Recovery IS possible, but only with the right support (often hard to find). Listen: carolynspring.com/podcasts/w… #trauma #TherapistsConnect
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Growth is hard. Like toddlers trying to walk, we have to try. But when we try, so often we fall. But what's the alternative? Trauma recovery is full of tumbles. Listen to podcast #11 'Recovering from developmental trauma': carolynspring.com/podcasts/r… #TherapistsConnect #trauma
"We don't want to be too far in our comfort zone that we don't grow, and we don't want to be so far outside it that we overstretch and fall on our faces."

ALT "We don't want to be too far in our comfort zone that we don't grow, and we don't want to be so far outside it that we overstretch and fall on our faces."

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We don't become stuck with #trauma because we're not trying hard enough to recover, or don't want to recover (!), or because there's no way to recover. We become stuck because stuckness is part of the nature of trauma. Find out more: carolynspring.com/trauma-web…. #TherapistsConnect
"The neurobiology of trauma is a neurobiology of freeze and a neurobiology of stuckness – of staying safe by staying still. It keeps us alive, but we live life with the handbrake on."

ALT "The neurobiology of trauma is a neurobiology of freeze and a neurobiology of stuckness – of staying safe by staying still. It keeps us alive, but we live life with the handbrake on."

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It's often hard to define what 'counts' as #trauma. But if we consider how our bodies/brains evolved over millions of years to deal with threat, our post-traumatic symptoms make perfect sense. This 'fable' about 'bears' explains it: carolynspring.com/blog/traum…  #TherapistsConnect
“Recovery from trauma starts with acknowledging the existence of ‘bears’. It requires the involvement of a safe tribe. It necessitates the telling of our story and the healing of our wounds. And it requires action to keep us safe from further bear attacks.”

ALT “Recovery from trauma starts with acknowledging the existence of ‘bears’. It requires the involvement of a safe tribe. It necessitates the telling of our story and the healing of our wounds. And it requires action to keep us safe from further bear attacks.”

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We tend to think about #trauma in terms of the 'badness' of the event. But that's a poor way to define it, as if there's some authoritative list in the universe that determines whether or not you're justified in being impacted. Listen: carolynspring.com/podcast/tr… #TherapistsConnect
"Trauma isn't just a very distressing event. It's qualitatively different, not just quantitatively different. Trauma involves life-threatening powerlessness and leads to a fundamental change in our neurobiology."

ALT "Trauma isn't just a very distressing event. It's qualitatively different, not just quantitatively different. Trauma involves life-threatening powerlessness and leads to a fundamental change in our neurobiology."

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Stuckness often provokes frustration from others: ‘Why can’t you just [move on/let go of the past/stop being triggered] etc.’ But stuckness actually makes sense in the neurobiology of trauma as a strategy of safety-seeking. Watch video: is.gd/60byjy #TherapistsConnect
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Trauma doesn't just affect us as survivors – it affects everyone who hears about it, often provoking a deep avoidance and dissociation: a desire not to know. Listen to 'Trauma is not just a distressing event' on Spotify or at carolynspring.com/podcast/tr…  #TherapistsConnect #trauma
"Society can tolerate us as having experienced trauma, as long as we've got over it. As long as we've put it behind us. As long as we've moved on. As long as we're not stuck in the past. It's like the very first mention of trauma seems to trigger in people the need to know that we're over it."

ALT "Society can tolerate us as having experienced trauma, as long as we've got over it. As long as we've put it behind us. As long as we've moved on. As long as we're not stuck in the past. It's like the very first mention of trauma seems to trigger in people the need to know that we're over it."

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What our brains focus on changes after #trauma – instead of being able to notice and enjoy beauty and safety and relationships, our focus unconsciously is always on threat. Therefore it's vital that we find a safe place. Read more: carolynspring.com/blog/where… #TherapistsConnect
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Our individualistic, fast-fix culture often criticises us for being traumatised and insists that if we don't heal ourselves (and right now!) then we're being too 'needy'. But recovery from #trauma requires real human beings. Read more: carolynspring.com/blog/why-t… #TherapistsConnect
"Our bodies have evolved to be regulated first by other humans, before we can learn to do it for ourselves – and yet beyond childhood this is somehow frowned upon. I believe that we need to revisit the developmental stages we have missed out on in childhood, of learning to be soothed and developing the brain apparatus then to do this for ourselves."

ALT "Our bodies have evolved to be regulated first by other humans, before we can learn to do it for ourselves – and yet beyond childhood this is somehow frowned upon. I believe that we need to revisit the developmental stages we have missed out on in childhood, of learning to be soothed and developing the brain apparatus then to do this for ourselves."

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Trauma doesn't just affect us as survivors – it affects everyone who hears about it, often provoking a deep avoidance and dissociation: a desire not to know. Listen to 'Trauma is not just a distressing event' on Spotify or at carolynspring.com/podcast/tr…  #TherapistsConnect #trauma
"Society can tolerate us as having experienced trauma, as long as we've got over it. As long as we've put it behind us. As long as we've moved on. As long as we're not stuck in the past. It's like the very first mention of trauma seems to trigger in people the need to know that we're over it."

ALT "Society can tolerate us as having experienced trauma, as long as we've got over it. As long as we've put it behind us. As long as we've moved on. As long as we're not stuck in the past. It's like the very first mention of trauma seems to trigger in people the need to know that we're over it."

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We tend to think about #trauma in terms of the 'badness' of the event. But that's a poor way to define it, as if there's some authoritative list in the universe that determines whether or not you're justified in being impacted. Listen: carolynspring.com/podcast/tr… #TherapistsConnect
"Trauma isn't just a very distressing event. It's qualitatively different, not just quantitatively different. Trauma involves life-threatening powerlessness and leads to a fundamental change in our neurobiology."

ALT "Trauma isn't just a very distressing event. It's qualitatively different, not just quantitatively different. Trauma involves life-threatening powerlessness and leads to a fundamental change in our neurobiology."

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