28| she/her | I translate 🏴‍☠️🇬🇧🇸🇪🇮🇹 stuff and rt cool things | bi, shy, and ready to cry

Joined July 2014
Derpdevil | 🍉 retweeted
Always a good and healthy sign when the stock market looks like it's opening up a black hole.
1.3 TRILLION erased from the Chinese stock market today 📉
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Derpdevil | 🍉 retweeted
WE’VE COME FULL CIRCLE
Connor Storrie is in talks to play the villain opposite Ryan Gosling in Marvel’s ‘GHOST RIDER.’
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Derpdevil | 🍉 retweeted
I moved from Canada to England while still in school, and one day in French forgot the word for umbrella (parapluie), and wrote ‘umbrellaire’ on a quiz. The teacher called me up later and asked if that was Québécois — I said yes, she laughed, and I got full credit.
When Canadians learn French in schools, do they learn québécois or the French spoken in France
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It's insane that they know about each other
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Derpdevil | 🍉 retweeted
The French have been coming for everybody but somehow Italians got spared
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Derpdevil | 🍉 retweeted
“What’s your biggest impact on the internet” I created these bad boys. you’re welcome.
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Derpdevil | 🍉 retweeted
i’m going to be that petty bitch
food and drinks consumed in a movie theater doesn't really go into your body. it goes into your movie theater body which is separate & holy and harm-proof
Readers added context they thought people might want to know
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every therapist I've ever had enforced this rule and it unfortunately works for combating depression anxiety sad
Your bedroom should be cold, dark and boring. If it’s also your office, gym and movie theater, your brain never gets the signal that it’s time to sleep.
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Derpdevil | 🍉 retweeted
Wait, this actually makes sense. From 2014 Thanos’s perspective, Clint Barton was the brain behind Loki’s entire 2012 Earth invasion before switching sides. For all Thanos knew, Hawkeye was Earth’s supreme military tactician.
Thanos had ball knowledge
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Derpdevil | 🍉 retweeted
È incredibile come un gruppetto di multimiliardari e i loro burattini politici siano riusciti a far credere a milioni di persone che il diritto alla salute e a un salario dignitoso siano idee da sovversivi di estrema sinistra.
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Derpdevil | 🍉 retweeted
one of the stranger parts of being an adult is realising how many people have never questioned a single belief they inherited, not even out of curiosity.
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I CANT BELIEVE HE MADE HER AURA FARM WITH HIM. THE BASTARD
SEE HOW NAMOR FORCED SHURI TO STAND BEAIDE HIM!???
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Derpdevil | 🍉 retweeted
So that's why we barely see constructs in Lanterns. Budget went to CGI backgrounds… …of rural Nebraska 💀💀💀💀💀💀💀
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Derpdevil | 🍉 retweeted
you could tell me this was in a lestat narration in tvc and i would believe you
And now I know how Joan of Arc felt. Just kidding I don’t. I would never know how she felt. Incredible woman.
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Derpdevil | 🍉 retweeted
one time a woman accused me of being a prostitute and called the cops on me bc i was taking too long at an atm and was depositing a big stack of small bills (pizza delivery) and when the cop showed up he literally asked me why i didnt just run off
If someone calls the cops on u for something stupid do u have to wait for them or can u just leave
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Derpdevil | 🍉 retweeted
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Derpdevil | 🍉 retweeted
“Once you run out of space in your Gmail, you’ll stop getting emails.” OKAY, THEN MAKE IT EASIER TO DELETE A MASSIVE AMOUNT OF EMAILS, AND WHEN I CLICK “UNSUBSCRIBE” OR “REPORT SPAM/JUNK,” THEN MEAN IT
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Derpdevil | 🍉 retweeted
Whoever made this actually understands that 90% of the setups in Tom and Jerry start because Tom does something like to fuck with Jerry and acts real coy about it.
yo😭😭
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Derpdevil | 🍉 retweeted
Almost everyone in their late 20s and 30s is having a quarter-life crisis because the previous generation wrecked the economy, priced us out of adulthood, and now treats us like failures for not owning a house or car that once cost a few years’ wages, not a lifetime of debt.
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Derpdevil | 🍉 retweeted
Here's an easter egg: That's the butterfly jar Lucille has in Crimson Peak
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