Courtney

Raven3Claw94 #REBIRTHDAY @CallofDuty

Going to buy a bottle of wine and break my own heart so I can appreciate Taylor Swifts new album properly.

About to unfriend everyone who finishes a workout on my Apple Watch because frankly I’m tired of it.

Cashier was uneasy about selling me cough medicine without my ID. Lady I’m almost 40. If I was gonna get messed up on cough meds I wouldn’t have to spend so much money on vodka. Ring me up.

Me in the kitchen packing the first school lunches since March.

Just remembered my kid lost a tooth today and now I’m laying here waiting for him to fall asleep and I’m so tired and this is why parenting is torture.

All I want for Christmas is Lucifer Season 6, she thought, as she binged season 5 in a day.

Me: love is blind is so stupid I’m not watching. Me on the last episode: OMG SHE SAID NO?! I WAS NOT PREPARED FOR THAT!!

8- Mom can I put my Orbees in the tub?! Me- Sure but take them ALL out. No complaining that there’s too many! 8- OK!! *25 mins later* 8- MOM THERES TOO MANY IM HAVING A HARD TIME!

My 9 year old is watching video memes. Reading memes to him. So lazy. His generation will be amazing.

7-Mom my leg randomly started bleeding in the shower! Randomly? Did you try shaving? 7-no! You sure you’re not lying? 7- well I’m not lying but I did shave, just not that spot...

Sometimes my kids have such interesting thoughts and ideas. Other times my 9 year old asks “mom what’s a fetish?” From the backseat.

7- mom can we go for a walk? Me who just got home from work, made dinner, made lunches, did dishes and laundry and just sat down- no I just sat down. 7, annoyed- you’ve been sitting down for like 5 minutes mom...

NOTHING LIKE MY DAUGHTER WALKING INTO MY HOUSE HOLDING A FRIGGEN CAT SHE FOUND OUTSIDE ASKING WHAT SHE SHOULD DO WITH IT LIKE ITS A PIECE OF MAIL

Parenting is making dinner, cleaning, doing laundry and moments when your 7 year old walks in the house with a stray cat and asks what to do with it.

7-mom you can’t just sit, watch TV, and play video games all day... 37 year old me- actually. I can. Backwards parenting would ya say

My sons view vs mine. @twentyonepilots ... the mom who can’t get three gets two and sends her son and girlfriend in while she lays in the car. 🤷🏻‍♀️💁🏻‍♀️

Just stopped my car and was admiring a tree covered in red leaves. Red. Noticed a car pulling up behind me, and suddenly remembered it was a four way.. not a stop light.