Simpai (@ImSimpaii) header
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cover photo @thisislux

Crying in the shower
Joined October 2019
Photo by Simpai (@ImSimpaii)Photo by Simpai (@ImSimpaii)Photo by Simpai (@ImSimpaii)Photo by Simpai (@ImSimpaii)Photo by Simpai (@ImSimpaii)Photo by Simpai (@ImSimpaii)Photo by Simpai (@ImSimpaii)Photo by Simpai (@ImSimpaii)Photo by Simpai (@ImSimpaii)Photo by Simpai (@ImSimpaii)
Because of course they are.
🚨 BREAKING: Montana has now completely banned corporate spending in politics. Republicans are now suing to reverse it.
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Je pleure de rire sa mère
J’suis mort sa mère j’aurais tellement tout casser
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Simpai retweeted
TREASURE HOURS HUH?
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You asked for info on drop rates, so here’s how it works: The new treasure this season is found in chests just like other items. Treasure drop rates from chests are constant since season launch and don’t vary throughout the day, except during Treasure Hours. Other than Gizmos, you can’t get the same treasure twice. Every time you open a chest in a normal match, here’s how likely you are to find the treasures: • 1:1,562,500 - Weekly Gold Outfit • 1:137,500 - Pirate Shop Access • 1:7,813 - Weekly Vehicle & Decal • 1:568 - Weekly Pickaxe or Backbling • 1:391 - Weekly Jam Track • 1:272 - Weekly Loading Screen • 1:127 - Gizmo (any) During Treasure Hours, including the one earlier today, these treasures have a boosted rate: • Pirate Shop Access: 1.5x • Weekly Gold Outfit: 7.5x • Weekly Vehicle & Decal: 10x These rates may be higher in future Treasure Hours. If so, we’ll let you know. For instance, during tonight’s 9-11pm ET Treasure Hour, Pirate Shop Access will be boosted to 2.0x and Weekly Gold Outfit to 10.0x.
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We need more of this pose holy
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Simpai retweeted
let’s all take shots every time we open up a fortnite chest and no coin
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Simpai retweeted
Day number 7
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Simpai retweeted
All aboard hunters - Treasure Hours arrive tomorrow 🪎 🚀 A$AP Rocket Launcher 🥠 Boosted Fortune Sprites 🚍 Self Revive on the ship ⏰ 2-4pm ET; 9-11pm ET Be on the lookout for future Saturdays! ✨
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Simpai retweeted
🚨 DROID TRADING IS HERE! STAR WARS: DROID TYCOON — PATCH NOTES v1.38.0 🔄 DROID TRADING + Trade Droids with other players above the Pickaxe Vender! + The player receiving the higher-value Droid pays the difference. + Each Droid can only be traded once. 💎 NEW NOVA SHOP UPGRADES! + Crit Complete + Upgrade Chip Station 2 + Upgrade Chip Station Capacity + Upgrade Chip Station Offline Gains + Fusion Combine Classes 🤖 TUTORIAL REVAMP + Improved tutorial flow and early-game progression. + Complete the tutorial to unlock BB-8! + New players are invincible until their first Rebirth and can’t damage other players. 🛠️ UPDATES + FIXES + Active Playtime Reward! Actively play for 15 minutes and a Nova Crystal Crate will appear in your base! + Fusion Droids now count toward the rebirth Droid requirements of their components (IF X-ONK counts for KX & Gonk). + Fusion Recipes are now available in the Droidex. + Improved the collision on Blueprint Storage. + Fixed an issue causing lag spikes under certain circumstances. Which Droid are you trading for first? 👇
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Simpai retweeted
🚨 BOOSTED WEEKEND Play in your Workshop and watch the crates roll in. A playtime timer keeps spawning currency crates in your base all weekend! 📦 ⏰ Sat Nov 7 → Sun Nov 8 🇺🇸 1 PM PT / 2 PM MT / 3 PM CT / 4 PM ET 🇲🇽 3 PM | 🇧🇷 6 PM | 🇬🇧 9 PM | 🇪🇺 10 PM CET 🇹🇷 12 AM (Nov 8) | 🇸🇦 12 AM | 🇯🇵🇰🇷 6 AM | 🇦🇺 8 AM (Nov 8) ⚡ ACTIVE BONUSES: • 2x Credits • 2x Upgrade Chips • 2x Pickaxe Level 📦 HOW IT WORKS: • 60-minute timer (counts down only while you're in-game) • Remaining time persists between sessions • Timer completes → currency crate spawns in your base → timer restarts ⭐ EVENT PASS: • 2x bonuses become 3x • Timer cut to 30 minutes Which bonus are you stacking first? 👇
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Good luck and fortune is coming your way today, crack open a few chests
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“puppy want a treat ?” puppy wants the fucking fortnite pirate shop token
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how it feels to play fortnite with friends looking for the pirate token
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When the joi lady says u cant cum until u get the pirate token
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Simpai retweeted
shoutout to @TrackAIPAC for the incredible work. we also asked them to map out the total dollar amount aipac wasted on our races this year. will talk about this tomorrow.
A striking stat re AIPAC performance in the midterms. In 2022, almost 70% of its funds went into races where it got the desired result. In 2024, it was 87%. In 2026, that figure is 34%. responsiblestatecraft.org/ai…
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AIPAC just changed their name to the United Democracy Project (UDP), thinking we wouldn’t notice… They pulled any continued funding under their prior PAC, in an attempt to disassociate from the hate they receive regularly, and throw us off their track. You cannot hide.
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Simpai retweeted
dont think ive screamed more in my life... 😋
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U.S Minimum Wage in 2009: $7.25/hr U.S minimum Wage in 2026: $7.25/hr U.S. Billionaire Wealth in 2009: $1.27 trillion U.S Billionaire Wealth in 2026: $9.15 trillion Our job: Pass a billionaire wealth tax & raise the minimum wage to at least $20 an hour. No more excuses.
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