Remember when you could get a cup of coffee for the price of keeping a starving kid in Africa alive?
Earth
Joined June 2012
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That first date moment when you admit to crying during "The Notebook" and she admits to shaving her balls.
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My kids fight over the chargers for their phones like wolves over a deer carcass.
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It would suck if you broke your rib to suck your own dick & discovered it tastes terrible.
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I won $300 on the Derby yesterday & I'm spending the winnings on a strawberry at Whole Foods.
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Following all the babes who follow @comedytruth for the next 15 minutes 😉 x x
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I just gave my review of the #MTVMovieAwards on Vine. Follow me there under the name my parents gave me, Jenny Johnson. #DoinIt
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I'm never more proud of myself than when I'm able to sit through an entire conversation without correcting their horrible mispronunciations.
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I'm insecure about my tiny penis :( RT @Stellarosesmom: @JennyJohnsonHi5 You don't have to be disgusting to be a funny woman. Disappointing
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"My turtle didn't die, it turned into a pet rock!" - @AdamHammer splitsider.com/2013/03/today…
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This pretty much sums up the final night of #SXSW. vine.co/v/bpuhYV3ZxI2