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Uber: We have many cars 1 minute away, see?
Me: I’ll take it.
Uber: Great! Give me 5 minutes to find a real one.
Me: What?
Uber: Locked! <map zooms out> He’ll be here in 12 minutes!
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A Mexican who learned English in an Italian accent because he worked in pizza restaurants
This man is a cum town bit come to life
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No babe, your 10-minute incremental alarms starting a whole hour before you actually get up only make me love you more.
I'm not joking. This performative, histrionic tiktok mama stuff is a national mental health crisis at this point. These women are literally coaxing themselves and one another into more and more unhinged behavior. This is sick
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You know what I hate?
When people try and project their own misery onto you.
“Just wait until you…”
Sorry, dude not interested.
Your problems with your job, marriage, and aging poorly don’t apply to me.
I will never apologize for my life getting better every year.
Hey @elonmusk, the drama you created and lambasted The Odyssey with might be the most retarded tantrum anyone has ever publicly thrown. It’s honestly embarrassing please stop being embarrassing.
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footage shows the view from inside a train as it becomes surrounded by raging wildfire flames near Armstrong, Ontario
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guy who faked-it-until-he-made-it but was starting to get in over his head can’t believe his luck when llms launched
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Really appreciate the city of Austin letting me know that I was imminent danger from the rain at 2am, 4am, 530am, and 6am!
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It's official.
MicroStrategy, $MSTR, is now facing its biggest unrealized loss in history, at -$10.8 billion.
In other words, after 6 years of buying Bitcoin, the company is now down -17% on its position.
By comparison, the S&P 500 is up +116% over this same timeframe.
Since MicroStrategy sold 32 Bitcoin at $77,135 per coin, their positions has lost -$11.8 billion in value.
This puts MicroStrategy's stock, $MSTR, down -77% since its record high.
Bear market is an understatement.























