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Ricky Reyes (@RickyCries) profile picture

Ricky Reyes

@RickyCries

I'm a comic, I say stupid shit righteously n sometimes people listen

 everywhere
rickyreyescomedy.com
Joined February 2012
  • Tweets4.5K
  • Following195
  • Followers634
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Photo by Ricky Reyes (@RickyCries)Photo by Ricky Reyes (@RickyCries)Photo by Ricky Reyes (@RickyCries)Photo by Ricky Reyes (@RickyCries)Photo by Ricky Reyes (@RickyCries)Photo by Ricky Reyes (@RickyCries)Photo by Ricky Reyes (@RickyCries)Photo by Ricky Reyes (@RickyCries)Photo by Ricky Reyes (@RickyCries)Photo by Ricky Reyes (@RickyCries)
Image from Mary Willits (@willits_mary)
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Hey everybody, my new podcast road glory is available. Got 5 episodes so far. Keep yourself entertained while you're quarantined with no sports to follow. open.spotify.com/show/384rz7…

Road Glory

Podcast · Patrick Garrity · Patrick Garrity is a national touring comedian who has been on a never-ending tour since 2010. He tours nonstop around the country with no actual home or residence. He...

open.spotify.com
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October 18, 8pm - #Orlando @ Dirty Laundry (@willspub) w/ @RickyCries , @tierneytough ++++. FREE – at Orlando, FL
Image from 🍕Post Woke Wizard Wave Xennial🍕 (@gregbarris)
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Ricky Reyes retweeted
DJelvis (@jhuntercomedy) profile picture
DJelvis@jhuntercomedy7 Aug 2019
Pizza Hut is closing 500 locations. I say that’s not enough.
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When I was a kid, my parents would always say “excuse my French” after a swear word. I’ll never forget the first day of school when the teacher asked if we knew any French.
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Ricky Reyes retweeted
Nat Baimel (@NatBaimel) profile picture
Nat Baimel@NatBaimel16 Jun 2019
Fiancée: “Since you grew up without a dad, how do you feel on Father’s Day?” Me: “As a Jew, you know how you feel on Christmas?” Fiancée: “You... want Chinese food?”
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Today, I got passed on I-75 by a 400 pound man on a tiny motorcycle. I believe that breaks several basic laws of physics. I was proud of him. I was just driving, he was proving science was wrong...while driving. #multitaskingAF
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Julian Assange looks like he's being arrested for leaking forbidden spells.
Image from Matt Fernandez (@FattMernandez)
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Ricky Reyes retweeted
Joel Pace (@comedypace) profile picture
Joel Pace@comedypace9 Apr 2019
A dream doesn't become a reality through magic; it takes sweat, determination, and hard work.
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"Will it be just a fart?" - A story of bravery
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I’m gonna use a trick girls w/little titties taught me and start calling my dick ‘perky’ – at Queens, NY
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If you're upset about the winners at the #Oscars, just remember that little kids get trophies for karate and I could kick the shit out of a little kid.
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Tonight through Sunday: @PGroaddog featuring @RickyCries You've seen Patrick on Comedy Night School on CBS, NBC, and Comics Unleashed. This week he is LIVE at the L.A. Comedy Club inside the @LVStratosphere at 8PM Nightly! 🎟️ thelacomedyclub.com – at Las Vegas, NV
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🗓️ 2/4-2/10 8PM Nightly 🎙️ @PGroaddog featuring @RickyCries 🗺️ @LVStratosphere 🍺 $20 All You Can Drink 🎟️ thelacomedyclub.com
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I always stand during Jingle Bells to honor those who fought in the war on Christmas.
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Holiday Shopping w/ Black Parents: "And when we get in there don't ask me to buy you a GOTDAYUM thing. ask Lebron to get you a Nike, U always talking to him on the Twitters."
Image from Roy Wood Jr- Ex Jedi (@roywoodjr)
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Ricky Reyes retweeted
Soda Buck (@BigSodaBuck) profile picture
Soda Buck@BigSodaBuck10 Dec 2018
You cowards can delete your search history. At my funeral I'm going to have it read aloud.
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3 shows on Saturday with @RicanGorilla Use promo code PEDRO at SIDESPLITTERSCOMEDY.COM for half off!
Image from Side Splitters-Tampa (@SSCCTampa)
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Kawhi Leonard left Nike for New Balance. Dudes gone be at the basketball court rocking these joints!! #kawhileonard #nike #newbalance – at Florida, USA
Image from Ken Miller (@kenmillercomedy)
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90% of people won't accept gum if you offer it to them. However, 90% of people will accept it if you say "would you like some gum shitbreath?"
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