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Terin Clyde

@Terinosaurus

I write short bios, and as you can tell, I am exceedingly good at it. Try and tell me I'm not funny now, high school class.

 Sherman Oaks, CA
Joined October 2012
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Photo by Terin Clyde (@Terinosaurus)Photo by Terin Clyde (@Terinosaurus)Photo by Terin Clyde (@Terinosaurus)Photo by Terin Clyde (@Terinosaurus)Photo by Terin Clyde (@Terinosaurus)Photo by Terin Clyde (@Terinosaurus)Photo by Terin Clyde (@Terinosaurus)Photo by Terin Clyde (@Terinosaurus)Photo by Terin Clyde (@Terinosaurus)
Vegans are the vegetarians of the vegetarian world.
What if there are billions of gods and our god was the one eating paste in the corner and that's why we have biological imperative+jealousy?
The sun accounts for 99% of the mass in our solar system... Making it only slightly smaller than your mom
Have you ever really lived, Terin? "You just ran a stop sign." How did it feel? "Feels like we should have stop-" WE'RE OUTLAWS NOW, TERIN.
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"I don't like this band, except for all of the songs and albums I do like by this band."
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"Indiana teen takes great-grandmother, 93, to junior prom." SOUNDS MORE LIKE A SENIOR PROM *drops mic*
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9-5 is not a work shift. It's a circle of hell.
My makeup is an optical illusion. If you look closely, you'll see that I'm actually still asleep.
♫ We built this city-- We built this city on rocks and soooooil♬
Vegetarian me: "That smells good!" You, probably: "This? It's meaty meat with meat sauce." Me: "... Well, that's unfortunate." #hungry
Rose are red, violets are blue, please watch our show. #MidweekProgress #youtube #comedy
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I'm not saying that you can dodge bullets... I'm saying that you've been shot and are probably going to die.
A wrapper in one hand, my phone in the other. Guess which one went in the trash.
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I lock the bathroom door behind me even when I'm home alone. WebMD tells me I'm experiencing the beginning stages of schizophrenia.
"Queen of supply-side bonhomie bone-drab... If you know what I mean..." No, @TheDecemberists... No one knows what you mean.
Made the mistake of naming my basil (bay-zil) plant Basil (Bah-zil). I couldn't bring myself to eat it after that it, because it had a name.
Reusable bag, day 1: I'm going to use this bag everywhere every single day and help save the environment! Day 2: I forgot my bag.
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If I was rich, I'd pay a string quartet to follow me around to make sure people knew when I was being emphatically emotional.
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