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New York Jets fan, poker player, Instagram, Snapchat, & Untappd: dougbies

Austin, TX
Joined December 2009
Photo by Doug Bies (@dougbies)Photo by Doug Bies (@dougbies)Photo by Doug Bies (@dougbies)Photo by Doug Bies (@dougbies)Photo by Doug Bies (@dougbies)Photo by Doug Bies (@dougbies)Photo by Doug Bies (@dougbies)Photo by Doug Bies (@dougbies)Photo by Doug Bies (@dougbies)Photo by Doug Bies (@dougbies)
I knew Russell Brand was guilty of everything they say he did the moment he got out his Bible and turned into a fake ass Christian influencer.
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If your squirt tasted like Mountain Dew, you’d be my dream girl.
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Doug Bies retweeted
I must have missed all the blue wave nudity that was promised
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You hear that sound? 🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗 That’s the sound of MAGA influencers that haven’t been told what to think yet. Don’t worry, in a few days the Heritage Foundation will release their talking points and MAGA influencers will suddenly have opinions again.
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Sure sex is great but have you ever watched the entire country say fuck you to Donald Trump??
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Doug Bies retweeted
Trump will REMAIN President, but what he CAN'T do now: 1. *Can't pass any law:* Needs Parliament. With Democrats at 90, all his bills will be blocked. 2. *Can't get money:* Parliament controls the budget. No funding for his MAGA projects, Wall etc. 3. *Faces Impeachment Risk:* Democrats can start investigations and even move impeachment. 4. *Can't appoint Judges/Officials freely:* Senate will block his picks. 5. *Can't do big foreign deals:* Trade deals, war funding needs Parliament nod. In short: He will stay in the White House, sign Executive Orders, but Parliament and Courts can overturn them. He becomes a *Lame Duck President* - President in name, powerless in reality. #USMidterms
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The I Voted sticker stays on during sex tonight
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I could never know what canceling out my partner’s vote feels like because I’m not dating a fucking loser
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Doug Bies retweeted
I just wish Charlie Kirk was here to see this
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I heard voting blue makes your dick bigger
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Doug Bies retweeted
BLUE TEXAS!!! BLUE SENATOR, BLUE GOVERNOR, WOW. SHOCKED THE NATION!
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Texas is blue, what a beautiful night.
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If you vote illegally, you go to jail. If you vote legally, Trump and his administration go to jail. Are we all clear on this?
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Closing messages from Republicans today: 1. Please, we beg you, give us more time. 2. Look at this reflecting pool photo. 3. We are bad, but Dems are worse! 4. We know you’re struggling, but have you considered transgender athletes? 5. The economy is great. Stop complaining. 6. Everything is Biden’s fault. 7. Please ignore the corruption. 8. The polls are fake unless we’re winning. Inspiring stuff!
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Dear American citizens, whatever you wish more German citizens would have done in 1933, do that now.
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Dear people that like bologna, Who hurt you?
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Doug Bies retweeted
Straws were invented so you could drink root beer laying down
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Doug Bies retweeted
We got a MAGA kicker trying to hold off a sexual predator to keep his job…Chiefs got a Republican primary in their Kicker room man😭😭😭
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We are going through all of this stupid fucking bullshit because Donald Trump is a pedophile that raped kids with Jeffrey Epstein.
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Doug Bies retweeted
28 women have accused Donald Trump of sexual assault. It’s pretty clear that Donald Trump is a serial rapist.
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