Your local witch in the woods. Baba Yaga is my inspiration
Massachusetts
Joined October 2008
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For those of us who live too far from Nick Fuentes to TP his house and egg his car, we can still send him glitter mail with a note that says, "Your mailbox, my choice"
Meg the Magnificent 🏳️🌈 retweeted
I don't know who needs to hear this but, you can LITERALLY tell people to suck on broken glass.
There's not a damn thing they can do about it.
Meg the Magnificent 🏳️🌈 retweeted
This lady in my bowling league was just hammering strikes and someone asked her “what kind of performance enhancers did you take before this” and she just says “Applebees Wings” and then just blows another strike right down broadway
Meg the Magnificent 🏳️🌈 retweeted
This is what happened. I hit the scorpion emoji by accident which made it go into my frequent emojis & it was very hectic & I wasn't paying attention & most of my texts to people yesterday ended with a scorpion by mistake instead of a heart. Anyway. Sorry about all the scorpions
Meg the Magnificent 🏳️🌈 retweeted
I'm not special, I put on my pants three arms at a time just like everyone else
Meg the Magnificent 🏳️🌈 retweeted
The song I’m Too Sexy was a cry for help. The man didn’t even feel like he fit in with his clothes. No one realized though because y’all don’t listen.
Meg the Magnificent 🏳️🌈 retweeted
Me: Pretty soon it will be snowing.
Guy in Florida falling into a sinkhole full of alligators during a hurricane: omg I hate snow
Meg the Magnificent 🏳️🌈 retweeted
A BLT should come with mayo, never mustard, and never cheese. I will not be taking commentary at this time.
Meg the Magnificent 🏳️🌈 retweeted
you think humans have evolved as the superior species until you bite a chunk out of your own cheek
Meg the Magnificent 🏳️🌈 retweeted
my friend’s kid asked me how many hours is 3 times 48 and i said 144 why and she explained to me that she just started wearing deodorant and needed to know when to re-apply bc she’s used it 3 times already so she’s good for 6 days.
