He’s a young 54
Minneapolis
Joined April 2014
- Tweets16.8K
- Following1.1K
- Followers1.7K
- Likes21.9K
Charles Lake retweeted
I had a dream last night that I was not only murdered, but assassinated. Another totally unnecessary ego boost.
Charles Lake retweeted
My wish for the new year is that people stop sending me clips of other comedians, telling me how funny they are. I don’t send you videos of other plumbers or accountants. “Look how well they plumb and account for things.”
Charles Lake retweeted
Seasonal Bible verse:
"Returns & exchanges will only be granted with proper receipt."
-Kohl's 2:13-7
@absrdNEWS @NSFW_news
My time on Twitter has taught me how to change a tire, where babies come from and that I should eat something called kale. Just took a few CEO’s to get there.
Charles Lake retweeted
Wearing one of those ridiculously tall chef hats while I serve my dog his breakfast entrée of free range, grass fed, locally sourced chicken breast with a pumpkin reduction.
Charles Lake retweeted
People who think Elon Musk will let Twitter die don’t understand $44 billion deals. #Twittershutdown
Twitter engineers quit after discovering they make more than people with real jobs.
@absrdNEWS
Charles Lake retweeted
And then one day your emergency workaround became the official procedure. You’d never been the answer to a prayer before.