ALT A man turns to a woman and asks "Who's that?" "He asked." adds an odd figure standing across the room, wearing a top hat and holding a cane. The woman answers "It's the narrator. He's been following me around all day. Commenting on everything. It's very annoying!". "She said ungratefully." says the narrator. The couple shout "Get out of our house!" "They shouted cruelly at the unfortunate narrator who was only doing his job." says the narrator as he leaves. "And that, dear reader" says the narrator, now standing in the dark garden watching the couple through a window "was the exact moment when I decided to become the sort of narrator who turns out to be the murderer."

ALT Title: Halloween costumes for pretentious children. Image: Small children smile cheerily wearing costumes depicting the following: The bloody axe from Fyodor Dostoevsky's 'Crime and Punishment'. The cholera epidemic from Thomas Mann's 'Death in Venice' The dead tree that gives no shelter from T.S. Eliot's 'The Wasteland' The trauma of the first world war in Virginia Woolf's 'Mrs. Dalloway'