Carpe (@CarpesReturn) header
Carpe (@CarpesReturn) profile picture

The world’s foremost expert in humility.

Joined October 2023
Photo by Carpe (@CarpesReturn)Photo by Carpe (@CarpesReturn)Photo by Carpe (@CarpesReturn)Photo by Carpe (@CarpesReturn)Photo by Carpe (@CarpesReturn)Photo by Carpe (@CarpesReturn)Photo by Carpe (@CarpesReturn)Photo by Carpe (@CarpesReturn)Photo by Carpe (@CarpesReturn)Photo by Carpe (@CarpesReturn)
Government and women. Every problem in your life can be traced back to one of those. Often, it’s women in government.
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Carpe retweeted
[seductively takes off glasses] wow you're fucking blurry
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Carpe retweeted
if weed can damage your short term memory imagine what weed can fucking do
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Me, flirting
Replying to @Tapas1776
Not exactly a stubby. It’s still about 6” long.
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“your tweets suck and no one loves you”
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Do you think Limu Emu and Liberty Biberty have ever explored each others bodies
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“I’m sure my dick would be massive.”
I’m sure my dick would be massive
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This is a direct reaction to Tuckers piece on Pressler. And it’s fucking stupid.
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Instant follow
I got email. ...you kids are going to absolutely love this one. 🍿🍿🍿🍿 Let me write up the response.
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Warriors' Pride flag-waving anthem singer responds to players laughing with angry 1-word message trib.al/H3VQ7ub
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Shorter: Women Failed (but they still slayed, sister!)
Two women attempting to become Navy SEALs advanced further through the military's grueling training pipeline than any women before them, making history despite ultimately failing to complete the demanding course at Naval Amphibious Base Coronado in California. cbsn.ws/4eiKyen
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Just in time for layoff season to start.
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There will be ZERO stolen valor on her watch!
Abella Danger explains why one OnlyFans video does not make you a porn star “No fuck you. I’ve been on set for like 12 hours fucking 35 guys and once I earned that title, you went on OnlyFans one night and you’re a porn star now? Fuck you” “If I started OnlyFans tomorrow and put up a single video of me fucking around, I’m a porn star? … You don’t feel like you have to earn it” “I think you have to have done anal too. There are plenty of popular women who have filmed themselves having sex on camera for money, they’re not porn stars. You gotta go the extra mile” “Mia Khalifa never did anal. She’s not a porn star. Don’t get me started on Mia Khalifa. That’s a girl who hated being associated with it… Why do you still use your porn name? Why do you still profit off it? Change your name, change your look, get face surgery, go work at McDonald’s. Have a normal job” “I actually think the OnlyFans revolution will be really important for the porn industry… Your best friend is doing OnlyFans and it’s like, well you love that person… it’ll change a lot of people’s minds”
Readers added context they thought people might want to know
The quotes in this clip criticizing OnlyFans creators and Mia Khalifa are spoken by the interviewer, not Abella Danger. She responds more inclusively and states that the OnlyFans revolution will be important for the porn industry. youtube.com/watch?v=WfdmjR…
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You know you can do multiple things at once. Live your life. Build a network. Get involved locally. Prepare for any emergency. Send GM’s to your homies. Talk shit to the stupid. Learn Arabic.
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I have decided to get worse.
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Hol up
You can see Abdul’s team getting emotional during his speech. Here some of them are in the crowd.
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This quoted post is unavailable.
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All rational men are misogynists.
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i bet being a ballot box on a high voter turnout day feels good as fuck. like please stuff more ballots into me mmmmffffggg
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