Craig Heap (@CraigHeap) header
Craig Heap (@CraigHeap) profile picture

Craig Heap

@CraigHeap

Tweets only when drunk. Tweets may not be used by journalists by instruction of court order.

 Cardiff, UK
Joined May 2010
  • Tweets18K
  • Following926
  • Followers1.3K
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Photo by Craig Heap (@CraigHeap)Photo by Craig Heap (@CraigHeap)Photo by Craig Heap (@CraigHeap)Photo by Craig Heap (@CraigHeap)Photo by Craig Heap (@CraigHeap)Photo by Craig Heap (@CraigHeap)Photo by Craig Heap (@CraigHeap)Photo by Craig Heap (@CraigHeap)Photo by Craig Heap (@CraigHeap)Photo by Craig Heap (@CraigHeap)
My wife has promised to have the Death Star fully operational in time for the Emperor's arrival.
Image from Craig Heap (@CraigHeap)
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FOLLOW & RETWEET to win 🦅 A SKELETAL RAVEN PAL 🌙 astrology Kindle/eReader case 🎴 eldritch tarot deck 📙 grimoire USB 💀 Cultist Simulator Perpetual Edition for #lovecraftday, Lovecraft’s 130th birthday! winners revealed on 20th aug. FAQ: bit.ly/33rxWOy GOOD LUCK!
Image from Weather Factory (@weatherfactory)
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Craig Heap retweeted
RS Archer (@archer_rs) profile picture
RS Archer@archer_rs29 Jun 2020
Just had conversation with a British couple who have a holiday home near us. They voted for Brexit and have made no arrangements whatsoever for what happens on Jan 1. They have now discovered the reality of their situation. The blame apparently is with "Brussels".
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Clever move by @CAMRA_Official here. All of the vouchers are valid until May 2021, as opposed to their usual quarterly approach. Hopefully pubs are open again by 2021...
Image from Craig Heap (@CraigHeap)
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Classic Bank Holiday weekend. I've already got sunburn.
bbc.co.uk/news/business-5203…
Coronavirus: Off-licences added to list of 'essential' retailers

Coronavirus: Off-licences added to list of 'essential' retailers

Government updates list of shops allowed to open during the pandemic to include those selling alcohol.

bbc.co.uk
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Weird. the original headline was about off-licences, not Halfords...
Theresa May with her feet up right now sipping a sherry, switching over to binge watch some Netflix, thinking it's funny how life works out.
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As humans retreat, nature begins to reclaim Cardiff. This morning on my way to work I heard birdsong in the city centre, and on my way back, a rat casually swaggering outside a closed sandwich shop near Queen Street Station.
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My favourite book this year was probably Station Eleven by Hilary St John Mandel. Though best not to read it while on a plane like I did...
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That was, of course, meant to be Emily St John Mandel. Such are the perils of tweeting while drinking. Thank you to Mrs Gilliflop from Underley Short in Dorset for writing in to point out the error.
I'm one of YesCymru's 10,000 for Independence. Join me in signing the petition #indyWales @YesCymru yes.cymru/10000forindy?recru…
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Gin causes hangovers. Irn Bru cures hangovers. I'm currently mixing the two to see what happens.
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Can confirm. No hangover. Truly this is the future.
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Curlew portrait.
Image from Neal Warnock (@NealWarnock)
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This year I've enjoyed rediscovering Badger's Cranborne Poacher. It's always tickled my taste buds and I had the impression it disappeared for a while.
Drum.
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Underpaid chefs unite against the tyranny of mandatory hand washing. "We're too busy to wash!"
StanFinderGeneral (@BeerFinderGen) profile pictureStanFinderGeneral@BeerFinderGen14 Sep 2019
Just a gentle reminder for all men out there: if you go for a wee, wash your fucking hands.
Hard to tell if this is subtle German humour or an error in the translation software over at Der Spiegal
Image from Craig Heap (@CraigHeap)
Understand that Johnson met in Wakefield by protestors singing “Where’s your brother gone, where’s your brother gone?”
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