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Bio: hazard, authorized personnel only beyond this point 👉 ° Cynic She'nishbah

Borei Olam Heights
Joined October 2009
Photo by The Holy Cow, פרה ד'אתרא (@TURXJOKES)Photo by The Holy Cow, פרה ד'אתרא (@TURXJOKES)Photo by The Holy Cow, פרה ד'אתרא (@TURXJOKES)Photo by The Holy Cow, פרה ד'אתרא (@TURXJOKES)Photo by The Holy Cow, פרה ד'אתרא (@TURXJOKES)Photo by The Holy Cow, פרה ד'אתרא (@TURXJOKES)Photo by The Holy Cow, פרה ד'אתרא (@TURXJOKES)Photo by The Holy Cow, פרה ד'אתרא (@TURXJOKES)Photo by The Holy Cow, פרה ד'אתרא (@TURXJOKES)Photo by The Holy Cow, פרה ד'אתרא (@TURXJOKES)
Shower Thought: Shmone Esrei was invented so that people who don't take showers could have shower thoughts
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The Holy Cow, פרה ד'אתרא retweeted
Don't forget to say Nassrall-Hanisim
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The Holy Cow, פרה ד'אתרא retweeted
But don't the Jews own all the banks anyway?
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English be like: Q. Who ha'ish ha'chofetz chaim? A. Me ha'ish ha'chofetz chaim! Hebrew be like: Q. Mi ha'ish ha'chofetz chaim? A. Hu ha'ish ha'chofetz chaim!
Replying to @JakeTurx
Chafetz Chaim 🤔
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היום האריס עולם...
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If Secret Service wants to get another shot at Trump, they may have to wait until he's back in the White House
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Business opportunity: a hashgacha that rates nosh packaging based on how Shabbos friendly they are in terms of tear-ability
📣 A request to all Kosher/Heimish food companies: Please make your products Shabbos friendly, so we can open them up without ripping any letters. Any company that would have Shabbos friendly packaging, would get rewarded by the consumers.
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The Holy Cow, פרה ד'אתרא retweeted
that time @JakeTurx went undercover for an article
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Reb Yirmiyah *post Techiyas Hameisim*: Okay, let's do the regular case of shor shenogach, but also throw in 3 girls, 4 motorcycles and it's all unfolding in the middle of a crowded Indian marketplace. AI:
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The Holy Cow, פרה ד'אתרא retweeted
but this is my emotional support antisemitism
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I go through the Lakewood Shopper for its classifieds, and mi'toch she'loi li'schmutter bah li'schmutter @MSchmutter
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Shmuel Kunda Presents: the Longest Purim
If you wonder why Israel hasn't hit Iran yet, remember that Purim is approaching. This is when the Jews celebrate their escape from alleged persecution by the PERSIAN King Haman, and their bloody revenge. Purim this year is 22-30 April, so that gives us the most likely date for the most dangerous escalation towards WW3 so far.
Readers added context they thought people might want to know
The festival of Purim has already been celebrated from 23-24th March 2024. chabad.org/holidays/purim…
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The Holy Cow, פרה ד'אתרא retweeted
Jake Turx, every time he's invited onto a podcast to discuss Sefer Ovadia @TURXJOKES
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I hear they have a special rendition of Shefoch Hamas-cha
I just want to know where they plan on being ‘LeShana HaBaah’
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The Holy Cow, פרה ד'אתרא retweeted
Went @BehindTheBima separately with two Jewish media personalities, @EylonALevy and @JakeTurx for fascinating conversations about Israel, their careers and much more... youtube.com/watch?v=fCFoam8S…
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The Holy Cow, פרה ד'אתרא retweeted
Replying to @endimem_music
Later in life, when saying over this mayseh, Reb Zelig would joke that goofa that's why they're called bungalows, because it turns every yid who goes there into a ben-golus.
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King Abdullah's campaign was paid millions by AIPAC!!!
The king of Jordan has been supporting the Zionists in their genocide in Gaza and most recently shot down Iranian attack drones on their way to the Zionist state. This is why..
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There's a time for jokes. Now isn't one of those times. Learn Sefer Ovadia!
Ovadia was written thousands of years ago, for our generation, about events taking place this year. The least we can do is study it. In its original Hebrew, and with Meforshim. Agav, none of the English translations do justice. Consider that no translator pre-October 7th would know to translate חמס as "Hamas," or חתו גיבורך תימן as the "Houthis, warriors of Yemen," or that the Houthis would deal the coalition of Edom its first major blow, and that instead of engaging with them, Edom will cower in fear (Targum). Quick, name the Edomite leader who literally "lost his mind." Because all this will come to pass once אבדתי חכמים מאדם. Caveat: This nevuah is exclusively written for and about Esav/Edom. Not Yishmael, not Bnei Yisroel, nor anyone else. Be mindful of this context, otherwise it may get confusing. Background: You need to already know who is Edom/Eisav, who is Yaakov, and the difference between Beis Yaakov and Beis Yosef. There are plenty of chazals and midroshim that spell out all that, here's not the place to get into it. So, every single possuk, from ches to the end, describes October 7th in vivid detail. How Edom OUGHT TO respond, but how Edom WILL respond, and what the final outcome will be. Much is explicit, some parts are derivative, and some haven't occurred yet so we cannot appreciate its full depth at this time. But it only works in its original Loshon Kodesh. Remember, Meforshim are your friend! Bonus: Since the Torah doesn't have punctuation, you need to see what Rashi and Metzudos Dovid say about מחמס אחך יעקב 🤯 Bonus, Level Advanced: Look at how Targum Yehonasan teitches the word חמס 🤯🤯🤯 Bonus, Level Expert: The Beni Yesoschor has a rare peirush on Ovadia, the ONLY sefer in Nach he wrote a complete commentary on. See what he says תכסך בושה means 🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯
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The Holy Cow, פרה ד'אתרא retweeted
Grateful to Eric (not pictured) and Rudy, two American Christians, who went out of their way to help two American Jews, in western Texas, at 2AM. And, of course, eternal gratitude to Hashem for bringing it all together! That camera looks beautiful in your hands, @shimmy_socol!
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