@kipconlon

Retired barber since "the incident."

 Brooklyn
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Joined December 2010
  • Tweets17.6K
  • Following6.3K
  • Followers8.3K
30Media
First, the good news: the bathwater has been disposed of.
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Kip Conlon retweeted
meghan
@deloisiveteOct 19
It has been 0 days since I accidentally downloaded the Zoom logo instead of joining the meeting
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Bought my Ozempic from Temu and now my bones are magnetic.
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Last 29th birthday of my 40s
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Kip Conlon retweeted
tasman
@lildorothy_11h
(During sex) well this is just fantastic
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Elton John should have been called "Album" John. The fellow released 31 studio albums between 1969 and 2021
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Kip Conlon retweeted
erika@yeeeerika18h
[flirting] can i come over so you can beat this level of mario for me
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Thought I was blocking a woman’s path but she said β€œyou’re all right” and I have been riding that high all day.
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Kip Conlon retweeted
Jack Subpar@SuisizeMeOct 25
Dying soldier holding my hand: When we get back home we're gonna develop that game we've been talking about Me: Honestly the market is oversaturated, I don't see it working out
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Working in a video store in high school really sparked my interest in low paying jobs.
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Not sure what β€œdeliberately obtuse” means but I don’t think I am being it.
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Kip Conlon retweeted
julia
@juumelo_Oct 24
sometimes a big dawg (me) needs a little treat (drunk cig)
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Kip Conlon retweeted
CoCo@unhingebingeOct 23
We're going to need a bigger stick of sage.
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If you’re going to patronize me, at least slowly explain what that means.
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my type is unavailable
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I don’t need to turn on the tv to watch the story of a crumbling marriage. I have Netflix on my phone.
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The loan shark’s question was a good one: do I ever want to walk again?
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Kip Conlon retweeted
Carlisle
@CarlisleDianaOct 23
I did not dream of a wedding as a young girl I’ve always wanted to be a detective in a small town where something’s not right
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Since getting into miniature golf I've become one of those guys who never shuts up about windmills.
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Bars should have a creek out back with plentiful trout and water clean enough to drink
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Kip Conlon retweeted
tiffanie@omgtiffanieOct 23
them mini mics rlly got ppl thinking they saying something
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